[mahalosux]

after reading about this, i feel like penning down wat happen to me during the past 2 days. pls bear wif me a bit. few weeks ago, my former PRC gf called me to ask me to raise 1500 RMB for her. the actual amt though not very big, but it's not small either as wif tat amt, i can do alot of things, such as paying my hp and credit card bills. i was hesitating and told her, i will try my best. but in actual fact, i wan to reply her a straight 'NO'! 2 days ago, i jus recieve my salary, she noe my payday, so she start sms me askin me whether i had remit the $. i din reply, i m still in a big dilema. i wanted to give her the $, but my mind tell me tat this is no the rite thing to do. bro, who had read my previous posts, know tat i had spent almost 30k SGD on this gal, and whenever she call me, it is about $ and whenever i call her, she will find it bothersome. yesterday, i was having a medical appt, while waiting for 3 solid hrs for my turn, my mind is still pondering on this matter. after thinkin for 3 solid hrs, i make up my mind and tell myself, this is it! no more remittance for her. after i walk out from the med center, i recieve 2 sms from her, askin me whether i had remit, i chose not to reply. this morning she sms me again, askin me about the money, i told her tat i unable to give her, as i hv a lot of 'debts' to clear, her reply is 'forget it! since u dun give me $ i will go indonesia and work instead'. i din reply, and i guess this will be the last time i will be hearing from her. i, myself dun feel good, and my heart is very heavy, as i m typing this post. i feel tat i m cruel, but at the same time, i m feeling sorry for myself. y? because of her, i hav been living miserably, unable to spoil myself wif luxury lifestyle and living like a beggar. as my fren told me, watever i earn, always end up wif her, pls spare a tot for yourself'

well moral of story is i tink i make the 'right move' but it is very hard for me, as i hv displayed 'cruelty' to a gal i luv for 1.5 yr.