mistress wants to bear baby

[a2014]

Originally Posted by korean

The idea of having baby has been around for a year plus. After some quarrels months ago, she didn't talk about it anymore. Before dropping hint to have princess ( she wants gal) recently, her mum rushed her to get married. In order to keep her mum happy, she will marry within two years, but will look for a men with child. If in future I become single, she will divorce n be with me. Now she seems dropping the idea of getting married since hinting to bear my baby. I would think she'd given a deep thought about it n not by impulsive.

You have to be very care in this situation. No doubt it looks logical to you. Just only curious, your term use as WL, how on earth she got into this trade and you mention ex-WL so how on the earth she got out of this trade. To me WL and FL is just a term used and in here it means something not good.

There are two ways of thinking:
1. She came here to join this trade voluntarily as working here as WL far back home nobody knows. She need some money and want to try. I have encounter someone before, warn her already still want to come, work in KTV and never even go short time with customer. How much can they earn then sitting around getting $20-$30, so after 2 months go home and be good girl. Back home divorce with a kid.

2. She knew what she is doing all along and wanted to plan for her old age, maybe someone back home advise her. With your kid, there is a high chance her old age is taken care of somehow if she were to get into a financial problem at a later stage. As you know everyone will age, and is a know fact nobody will care for you at that time when you are single.

Not all people in PRC has a luxury of life, most of them have to struggle to survive. They may be married back in China but may actually love someone somewhere else. Somehow looks like part of their culture, not sure how it works. Some of these people there literally when they love you they practically can do anything for you.

But you have to think twice before anything, is it fair for that man who going to marry her. Even if she is to marry is it going to be a solution. Must well she just go married and keep contact with you, does she belief in you love her or not, why need a child in between as a safety net.

Just one question, how long you are in relationship with her ?

As for your wife, I guess that not that you don't love her, seems to me it has developed into a different type of love relationship and happened that this lady manage to patch up those short coming and now three hands clap together. Looks like this saga will not end.

Take care.

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

You have to be very care in this situation. No doubt it looks logical to you. Just only curious, your term use as WL, how on earth she got into this trade and you mention ex-WL so how on the earth she got out of this trade. To me WL and FL is just a term used and in here it means something not good.

Bro, Thx for spending time to read n reply my thread.

No doubt be it wl or fl is not good

She was not in this trade before came to sg. As she got a mother and a younger bro to take care, she chose to join this trade in order to earn sufficient to:

- buy a house for her mum
- buy a house for her bro for marriage purpose in future
- optionally buy herself a house
- some money to survive or do business

This was being seen as an opportunity to 转运 as their family members didn't have opportunity to study much and she sacrificed in order to provide her family members a better life.

FL refers to a lady typically with social or student pass who works illegally without a license whereas wl refers to a lady with one time license who works legally for a term up to 2 years.

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

Just one question, how long you are in relationship with her

Around one and a half year

[a2014]

Originally Posted by korean

- buy a house for her mum
- buy a house for her bro for marriage purpose in future
- optionally buy herself a house
- some money to survive or do business

Looks like apparently there is a long shopping list. Now she is back home, how is she going to fund this shopping list then. Have not seen anywhere that you are supporting her therefore I would assume that she has her way out then.

I don't think having your child is a good move. You are on two piece of land far away, therefore it is not something that you can every think of as you have said before unless you are on business trip other than that no way out.

My opinion is that better to ask her to get married there and keep in contact. If both of you love each other then trust is the only thing you can hope for. Let time decide, do not burden her with something extra or rather burden yourself actually. Further more your thinking may change as you age and future encounter if any.

Love has got no boundary, therefore do not limit yourself to husband and wife issue.

Take Care Bro,

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

But you have to think twice before anything, is it fair for that man who going to marry her. Even if she is to marry is it going to be a solution. Must well she just go married and keep contact with you, does she belief in you love her or not, why need a child in between as a safety

Yes it is not fair to that man. Maybe I should educate her on this. When she told me that, I was touched. But in my heart I blessed her to find someone she loves and who can give her happiness. I see it as opportunity for her but now she may not give herself the opportunity. But who knows, things change over time. For time being I just let the fate decide.

[a2014]

Originally Posted by korean

Around one and a half year

This one make sense, don't rush into it. At this stage you tends to panic. I can only tell you let time decide, you shall see. If love is really there, no matter what she was and where she is, it's not going to be an issue.

For 8 years now, I still have not figure out a solution as my views and thinking changes as I age.

Technology is so advance.

[korean]

Originally Posted by korean

Yes it is not fair to that man. Maybe I should educate her on this. When she told me that, I was touched. But in my heart I blessed her to find someone she loves and who can give her happiness. I see it as opportunity for her but now she may not give herself the opportunity. But who knows, things change over time. For time being I just let the fate decide.

Getting married may not be the solution for her, it is mainly to make her mum happy. I don't agree with this but I also don't want to interfere much.

She believes I'm loving her, just occasionally have some doubts which gave me headaches.

What do u mean need a child in between as a safety net.

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

As for your wife, I guess that not that you don't love her, seems to me it has developed into a different type of love relationship and happened that this lady manage to patch up those short coming and now three hands clap together. Looks like this saga will not end.

Seriously speaking I really don't love my wife, even before the relationship started. I know everyone will ask me why started the relation and even went into marriage stage. It is long story and I can only said due to my weakness (soft heart) when I was young. Before marriage, many attempts of breakoff failed. After marriage, many attempts of divorce failed too. So I just accept my fate as it is.

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

Looks like apparently there is a long shopping list. Now she is back home, how is she going to fund this shopping list then. Have not seen anywhere that you are supporting her therefore I would assume that she has her way out then.

The idea of buying her bro a house is abandoned as she doesn't have so much money now and his bro is single at the moment.

Buying a house for her mum n bro staying together is in progress at the moment.

She borrowed quite a large sum of money to her elderly sister for agriculture purpose and it seems won't be able to collect back the money permanently.

Biggest spending was bought a shop lot costing rmb1.5mil decided by her mum while she was still in sg. Problem is only after 5 years the rental will go into her pocket, before that the rental will go into developer pocket.

So she is short of money to start a business.

[a2014]

Originally Posted by korean

She believes I'm loving her, just occasionally have some doubts which gave me headaches.

You have got no choice, relationship in such a manner is the most unstable. Sometime they believe in you, sometime not. You have to deal with it.

Originally Posted by korean

What do u mean need a child in between as a safety net.

She can only think one step at a time now. Maybe she think having your kid and get married to someone else, in future she can still get back with you if you are available and also a good asset that at time of need you may support her a little here and there in the future.

However she fails to understand that time and circumstance (change of event) is very cruel. She may loose the bet in future.

And again at your end, do not leave anything behind that will eventually haunt you. We all do not know what going to happen in future, be it good or bad.

[a2014]

Originally Posted by korean

She borrowed quite a large sum of money to her elderly sister for agriculture purpose and it seems won't be able to collect back the money permanently.

This one very familiar, many people told me something similar.

Originally Posted by korean

Biggest spending was bought a shop lot costing rmb1.5mil decided by her mum while she was still in sg. Problem is only after 5 years the rental will go into her pocket, before that the rental will go into developer pocket.

This one got verify or not, YES this is normally their dream when the first decide to come to sg to cheong. Again the house under who's name. Hopefully she don't start a donation drive on you.

Originally Posted by korean

So she is short of money to start a business.

This one I guess most of them that come here may not achieve after those asset are taken into account.

How long has she gone back to PRC. Look like she will not be able to return to sg again.

Apparently the only way out for her is just go get married in china to someone she like since she can cope with the house now. If she still think of you, then you visit her once in a while if possible. Eventually how long does this last will depend on faith. Maybe at this time you still not be able to get along with what is happening, you will gain to understand some time down the road.

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

This one got verify or not, YES this is normally their dream when the first decide to come to sg to cheong. Again the house under who's name. Hopefully she don't start a donation drive on you.

I don't go n question her in details as I just trust her after knowing her for quite sometimes and she never lie to me at all. The shop is under her mother n her name. What do u mean by start a donation drive on me?

[a2014]

Originally Posted by korean

I don't go n question her in details as I just trust her after knowing her for quite sometimes and she never lie to me at all. The shop is under her mother n her name. What do u mean by start a donation drive on me?

Understand from you previous post you didn't support her. Maybe it's not her style to ask you or maybe she telling you all this is expecting you to at least do something be it a little or something more in terms of monetary to tie her across so call her difficult time.

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

Understand from you previous post you didn't support her. Maybe it's not her style to ask you or maybe she telling you all this is expecting you to at least do something be it a little or something more in terms of monetary to tie her across so call her difficult time.

Yes I didn't support her. Initially she didn't want to tell me much as she knew I got my own problems. I can sense that something was bothering her so probed here n there finally she told me her condition that her mum going to sign the contract (next day iirc) as it is the best shop lot and going to be taken away if not sign asap (old sale tactic). She was short of money that time so her mum borrowed some from the relatives (fully paid now). I guess if a lady try to cheat my money that is a good time to attempts lol. That was the time she tried to get back her money from her sister n shocked that her sister cannot folk out a single cents

[Greendevil]

Originally Posted by korean

Ok. I don't pay her allowance, so is considered bf-gf relation according to your definition.

TS, so you step on the land mine liao la. Anyway, she need your sperm to meet the egg right and it safely kept in your egg sack rite. Let her talk and kpkb. End of the day, No sperm, no baby.