📖 The Journal of Iris 📖

[geelang]

Stay strong

[bradplay2018]

Originally Posted by Iryiris

Sometimes i wish i have the gut to just end things. If i brave enough to just jump down, that would be good.

Everyone got depression before and its how we manage to find a break through and get through it. I not sure what happen to you but I myself had fallen to the darkest low time too and had depression but I manage to survive and came back stronger.

Hope the same for you.

[chaoturtle]

Jia you. I hoped everything will turn out fine for u soon!!

[Iryiris]

Will be giving a stop to everything soon. Thanks for the support.

[Iryiris]

http://17sing.tw/share_song/index.html?sid=45204787

A-Lin - 我等到花儿也谢了

It been a long time i sang. So on my app and sang to my heart contented. Choose this song to post cos it somehow about how i feel. My vocal still not completely healed as i was not well due to cough previously. This app requires earphones to record but i don't have it as mine already spoilt. That's explained why some parts were kinda soft. Nevertheless, nothing to shout about, just sharing that's all.

[Iryiris]

Perhaps people are puzzled why suddenly i suffer from depression. It not happened just overnight of course. It all the accumulation that made me into this. It not just my debts, work or finances. There are things which are hidden secrets that i rather choose not to say. I can only reveal my aftermath as I do not want another episode to happen again.

This happened a year plus ago. Cos of protecting someone whom had some special relationship with me, I was injured from head to toe. My head was stitched, face was injured as well as my body. I had grown back longer hair to cover the scar on my head. As for face, nobody will believe my face was partly disfigured if i don't say. I really have to thank god it didn't had much damages. My looks is nothing fantastic anyway so nothing to praise about. So before you wanna start criticise me, please think twice from now as i already went through a very bad ordeal. I choose not to be here if I have a choice.

I have changed my identity due to this incident, cos i didn't wanna let those that did this to me to find me. I didn't offend anyone. I also an innocent party cos i protected someone whom i thought was worth it but ended up he was not. Anyway it over but it a painful lesson. Til now, i will not know when i can have a peaceful life. So you see, don't judge someone like me like you are paying super big fuck bucks. I'm a human afterall and so do you. If you wanna criticise me, make sure you are good enough if not, go and fuck some spiders. No offend, some guys are really meant to be fucked. I experienced 1 with no respect to girls. I nearly hit him but i held back. I'm not afraid of such issue but i didn't want due to my agent back then will face problem if i used violence. Recently i bumped onto him as i didn't know it him. But i rejected him hahaha. Who say FL can't reject CS. Of course i didn't ask for rejection fee as it not he rejected me. I bet he couldn't recognised or recall who i was or, he offended too much gals til he blurred too hahaha. I'm not here to claim sympathy due to my encounter. Just hope guys out there show some basic respect to gals out there. If i wanna claim sympathy, i already did from the day i came back. Everyone of us has dark secrets or faced bad ordeals. Don't judge things quickly just on surface cos you might be wrong on your judgement.

[Jackal Junior]

Originally Posted by Iryiris

Will be giving a stop to everything soon. Thanks for the support.

Don't stop until I get the chance to see you sis!

[Persistantly]

Pls don't stop but continue

[8ya8]

Super duper story. Pls continue.

[ahniuu]

Originally Posted by 8ya8

Super duper story. Pls continue.

My exact sentiments.

[Iryiris]

Nothing to share or continue already. Will be stopping soon and close both threads once i stop.

[Drapion]

Thanks for the sharing

[invertigo]

hey sis maybe keep this dairy running ? always enjoy ur updates and pictures

would be really sad to stop reading your updates and not seeing more pics of u

[Iryiris]

Dreams are weird. I had a dream earlier on. I was in a train but this train was not meant to travel around. There was a live band, for what i thought so. The music were not sang by original by the artists. More felt like it live music. I was with a friend but couldn't figured out who was she. The train was quite crowded. Everyone was listening to the music. It seemed that they were doing a countdown of the music. Those songs were quite old, roughly from 70s moving to 80s to 90s. I was impressed by this little girl who looked about 6-7 years old. She seemed to know most of the songs. She was singing along.

Was sitting down listening to the music and watching the little girl. My friend was talking to someone beside her. This song was played. It was an English song. It sounded familiar but in the dream, i was humming along. As i hummed, tears started to fill my eyes. Tears rolled down from my right eye. I kinda turned away and looked down, opened my bag and searched for tissue. The song became a Chinese version on the 2nd part. As it went, tears kept rolling and rolling. I was not sure anyone saw me crying or i wouldn't even cared. The music still went on and on til i slowly opened up my eyes. I was in reality, lying on bed. The music somehow still lingered on even i awoke. The feeling of sadness i had in dream was brought along even i awoke. I was not crying in reality but it a heavy feel inside my heart. This was kinda suck to start your day with heavy heart.

This was the song i talking about.

https://www.xiami.com/song/376383?_u...D9990B3D51A534

孙燕姿 - 终于

I'm wondering is there an English version of this song?

https://www.xiami.com/song/72459?_ux...D9990B3D51A534

Was listening to this song. That's this part which was the last part that goes, 男人啊也会软弱只是不说. I guess it not only to guys, it should be 人啊也会软弱只是不说. No matter how strong or tough a person is, we still have our weakest moment. It just that we choose not to say. Choose not to say, doesn't mean we are ok, it what's the point of saying when end of the day, still have to solve the problem alone. So i rather don't say.

[invertigo]

seems like sis is a fan of sappy songs too

try 结局 also by 张克帆。。