Where is my happily ever after?

[DAdults]

TS, the answer isn't here in the forum... It is inside you all along.. You just have to accept the answer in your mind. Once you have decided on your course of decision, your mind will no longer be confused.

Maybe it will help if I give my humble 2 cents. Here goes.. I believe your problem can be surmised in 2 words: Mismatched Expectations. No one is perfect. Neither is anyone completely without any good points. This you can relate to your husband... I believe. What you need to do, is to consider any love that you still hold for him, the possibility of change for the better, whether it is for the best that you stay together. Then be decisive and make a decision. You have spent much youth on this issue; don't let your inner confusion consume you further.. ok?

And one more thing, it is better to face the issue head on and do something about it rather to have regrets later for not acting. Have no regrets!

Lastly, someone reminded me about this quite recently... In life, there are a lot of "don't know"s.. But they are always there... You will never know unless you tried and gave your best shot...

Hope you find a satisfactory solution to your solution! Good day to you..

[helloworld11]

TS, personally I don't think it's a good idea to throw good money after bad money.

Just like in gambling once you lose money on one share it is better to take your losses and walk off rather than pump more money in hope that the price will bounce.

Truth is the more years you spend in a relationship the harder it is to let go. If I were you, I would think really hard about whether this can really workout in the long term especially since you already married.

One thing I learn not to rely on is age though... I firmly do not believe that people grow wiser or smarter or whatever as they get older. I think age has nothing to do with one's mentality or capabilities. Whatever the outcome of your decision I hope it's after much careful consideration and communication with your husband rather than just 'let time pass' and 'hopefully' things get better. If anything i think things will only get worse or at best stay the same?

my 2 cents worth...

[thomastankuku]

More difficult to share with stranger or more difficult to share with close one?

But diff ppl diff character la.

Ur story true or u just trying to do school project no body will know but may be also not important la.

If you want attention you come to right place liao cos here you identify as woman say you looking for option you will get tsunami of response soon.

This isnt the right way out if wat u say is true. Here is mostly hum sup lou with motive and agenda. Get into gd shoes 2 get into something else.advice is free but anything more is a package liao.

But cannot blame them cos not say all but largest percent of gals here are working whores, exwhores, tease queen , wannabes or just psychos.

This is a whore & whoremonger forum mah!

Anyway problem gambling is a real issue and got professional to help out one. Somemore got a lot of social worker and counsellor both gov or pte one who are experts.

Work with them and wif ur larger family and wif church or other support group and dun try to tackle it all by urself or just u and ur spouse twosome.

As for ur n his psychology issue and sex disatisfaction n marriage prob also best got professional that can help sort out one.

Oso hor first thing communication with partner is impt la. As long as not violent kind talk things calmly and honestly through and try to rebuild trust understanding or coonnexion.

If really cannot then best to get some help from external party. And if not work at least u had ur best shot best be a gd strong woman and walk.

All things gd in life need work and effort. Two people involve means both must oso come to some agreement to effort together.

No point post in commercial sex forum if only to get some attention one.

Advice u get will be same and general. Might as well look for real expert leh.Just Focus on wat is important and work from there.

[see see only]

Originally Posted by helloworld11

One thing I learn not to rely on is age though... I firmly do not believe that people grow wiser or smarter or whatever as they get older. I think age has nothing to do with one's mentality or capabilities.

Ha .... tat's something i always tell my mum

Anyway bro helloworld ... well said .... if they do not wake up at a certain point ... they will just go worse off instead of grow wiser

NICE ONE

[kurbit]

Dear TiredSal,

I'm sorry to be blunt here, but here's my take...

You should stripped away all the emotions and whooohaaas! and look at the problem objectively. Often, you will realize that the solution is very simple and clear.

If you have already identified the problem. The rest basically lies on your judgement n decision. No one is indispensable in this world.

If you drag for too long, you will sink deeper. And when you sink deeper, you will be more lost and when you are lost... there goes another fine lady...

Sometimes... it takes 1 wrong step to ruin your happiness.

Sis, i wish you all the best. And hope things will turn out well for you.

[今晚打老虎.]

TS there r 2 cues for you to leave him..
1. When he borrow $$ from you
2. When he threatens to hurt and harass your family

You took neither cues and are paying for it...

Clear up your mind and leave him...
or if you really love him.. have a heart to heart talk with him. If he loves you as well.. he will change, I am sure.. but if not, who needs such a jerk. Break off with him

[raiders]

Hi Threadstarter, the only person who can help you is yourself. As long as you continue to toil in this relationship, you will continue to suffer financially and emotionally. A girl's value goes down with age. Don't wait anymore. Sometimes, to cut the losses is actually winning.

[Gentle Beast]

Your problems with your husband is pretty common among young couples. Constant quarrels over money, petty issues etc and expecting the other to change first are signs of a weak relationship. I don't think you and your husband are suitable for each other, better to walk away now than regret later. If you don't agree with me, come back and read this thread again in 3 years time.

[angmoguy]

thats married life, its always a compromise. forget the fairy-tale happy ever after rubbish, this is the real world, life is hard. talk to each other, sort out your minor problems (and they really are minor problems) and get on with your life together. you both married young, now's the time to really grow up, stop acting like children, take responsibility for your marriage vows.

[mintyone]

Hi sis..everyone loves a "happily ever after"... just like everyone hopes to win the toto or big sweep. The odds are one in a few million.. Same goes for love. Its not easy to find that someone who loves you unconditionally and forever. If you find THE ONE then its like struck toto if not live life the best you can.... Happiness is controlled by ourselves, not depend on someone else. I would very much love to tell you to leave him but i know saying is so much easier to doing it. whatever you do, Just remember, your happiness does not need to depend on others.

[blohsg]

Erm ... it's a whole bunch of strangers you're talking to here but each contribution has its merits.

After all, its your marriage and your life ... if you're not happy about it ... you'll have to Find a way, communicate and decide what to do.

TALK to FAMILY&FRIENDS who are supportive and do something about it ... all it takes is that 1st step.

[nullnullnull]

Relationships are like shoes.. Some of them just don't fit and it hurts like hell to just walk with it.. However if you are willing to bear the pain just walk on.. If not then just cut your losses and go get another one..