Price to pay for helping Matters of the Heart

[DTCEPL]

Originally Posted by DO_YOU_BJ

A clear mind is a dangerous mind!
Welcome to the world of the clear minded

Another version for your consideration:

A clear mind is a HORNY mind

A mess-up mind is a KC-ed mind

The above applicable in SBF context lah

Hiaz....life is always filled with uncertainty, how nice if we can always see whats ahead and plan or be ready for it.

[slider_72]

Put it this way, there are some people who deserved to be helped and some who don't. There are people who appreciate you for lending your helping hand and those who bite the hand that feeds them. End of the day, it is your own conscience that holds you.

I for one really appreciated your words of wisdom when I was down in the past. Now I'm still in the game but hopefully as the predator and not the prey. Hahaha.

[WOOHOO]

bro colins
me WOOHOO need help too can help me bo??^^

[colins]

Originally Posted by xyz1001

This happens when one allows fate to push him around. And it will continue to push until he is able to determine his self worth, his belief. Life is never fair at one time but is fair all the time. Bro A has no one to blame for his life to be so messed up becoz he ALLOW that to happen, he allow himself to be pushed around. So he can quit complaining.

Originally Posted by aczeta76

A lot of people like to escape into similar problems and cycles as they fear different things. Some like Bro DYBJ said are "犯贱“ and they juz like the feelings of being treated like that.

To those people, if u are too nice to them, their auto reaction is to become more shitty to you as they cannot tahan the good things people do to them... machiam like they do not deserve it.

Thanks for your insight over this point. Our self-confidence do play a big part in our expectation of the ways we are being treated. It is quite sad to see that some of us avoid confrontation becos we do not have the tools to protect ourselves. Further down this road, they just give up. No matter how you want to poke their pride and make them wake up, you can't pierce thru the layers of protection they built around it. Its not wall of protection, but wall of fats. On the flip side, they themselves can't even use that pride anymore, all they know is to defend themselves, deflecting hurt by escaping from reality.

[colins]

Originally Posted by pewpew

Sometime, you tried to protect your buddies from being harm, in return you will get nothing but setbacks.

Just remember, true buddies are hard to find so... Even if there are road blocks inbetween the process of helping, hope you can keep trying.

Reason = Buddies

Actually, my approach is never to try to protect. It might cause more harm. Once the pride is pierced, self confidence can be rebuilt. That is where I am coming from.

If there is no expectation, there will be no setbacks. You need to be stronger and clearer than the person that you are trying to help. No expectations, no disappointments, knowing these will keep you going.

[FL Lover]

Originally Posted by slider_72

Put it this way, there are some people who deserved to be helped and some who don't. There are people who appreciate you for lending your helping hand and those who bite the hand that feeds them. End of the day, it is your own conscience that holds you.

I for one really appreciated your words of wisdom when I was down in the past. Now I'm still in the game but hopefully as the predator and not the prey. Hahaha.

Bro, sometimes we need to let someone to fall down and learn from his pains. I always believe that if someone choose to remain in his own world while ignoring those who cared abt him... he does not deserve to be helped by others.

When I was down in my early stage of cheonging, I did not seek help from any bros here. I too able to stand up and live a good life after that. So the conclusion, if a person had made up his mind, he can do it. If he does not want to be helped, there is nothing u can do. Best you can do is to watch him fall, come to SBF to complain how WLs or KTV gers had cheated him of his $$ and career. No pain, No gain. Part and parcel of life. That's experiences.

There are many things that we need to accomplish in this world rather than sex and gers. TS, ask yor friend to give it a thought. Another sad case.

PS, I am a frank person. It is just a view on this issue. Seen too many such sad stories.

[colins]

Originally Posted by slider_72

Put it this way, there are some people who deserved to be helped and some who don't. There are people who appreciate you for lending your helping hand and those who bite the hand that feeds them. End of the day, it is your own conscience that holds you.

I for one really appreciated your words of wisdom when I was down in the past. Now I'm still in the game but hopefully as the predator and not the prey. Hahaha.

Bro slider, you for one, has a lot of wisdom in you. I am just a volunteer, on standby to listen and lend a brain. Yours is an easy case cos you already know where you are heading. The rest is just a matter of time.

Predator and prey, I think before we know which class we belong to, we must first understand this statement - one man's rise is another man's demise. Predator and prey dun stay and live together, confrontation is always short and that is only necessary to devour the prey. After that the predator searches for his next meal, that prey ceased to exist in his world.

[colins]

Originally Posted by WOOHOO

bro colins
me WOOHOO need help too can help me bo??^^

hahaha bro woohoo, if you also got a case, I need to refer you to the Jedi Council liao, cos it must be a really really big issue if you also can't solve.

[xyz1001]

Originally Posted by FL Lover

When I was down in my early stage of cheonging, I did not seek help from any bros here. I too able to stand up and live a good life after that. So the conclusion, if a person had made up his mind, he can do it. If he does not want to be helped, there is nothing u can do. Best you can do is to watch him fall, come to SBF to complain how WLs or KTV gers had cheated him of his $$ and career. No pain, No gain. Part and parcel of life. That's experiences.

Agreed, that is life experiences. But experience comes in different forms. Bro u can stand up on your own without seeking help becoz ur mind is strong, u are suppose to be able to do it. But there are others who needed help to pass this stage. I believe pple and pple meet for a reason. If bro A is strong enough, bro B and colins wouldn't be there. (of course, there might be some other reasons but is for them to find out too)

If bros can still come back to SBF and complain, that's good. At least they survived and learnt. Some just disappear, too deeply hurt to recover, some didn't make it back. We never know what happened to them, btw how many TS disappear?

[colins]

Originally Posted by xyz1001

If bros can still come back to SBF and complain, that's good. At least they survived and learnt. Some just disappear, too deeply hurt to recover, some didn't make it back. We never know what happened to them, btw how many TS disappear?

Insightful. And how many TS come and share their recovery?

[FL Lover]

Originally Posted by colins

Insightful. And how many TS come and share their recovery?

Hahaha... Its all depends on the person himself. If he choose to believe whatever the ger said then god bless him.

It is beyond what TS can do for his friend. He is too deep into the KC. No way you can wake him up from there unless he gets the fall.

Just think back when we got into our FIRST KC by WLs, we also dont listen or refuse to listen to all those who tried to help us initalliy until we got hurt emotionally or when $$ got suck dry by WLs.

Same thing now. Whatever you have done for your friend, you have already done your part. The rest, MAY THE GOD GUIDE HIM TOWARDS THE LIGTH...

[kyooky]

Bros Colin, u had already put in your afforts to help....it's more than enough........let the river flow it's path.
Everyone has it own path of road to go.

[slider_72]

Originally Posted by colins

Predator and prey, I think before we know which class we belong to, we must first understand this statement - one man's rise is another man's demise. Predator and prey dun stay and live together, confrontation is always short and that is only necessary to devour the prey. After that the predator searches for his next meal, that prey ceased to exist in his world.

Errr, Bro, that statement is a bit too profound for me to understand. Maybe next time we meet for teh tarik you can explain further.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Originally Posted by ekemono

Didn't follow up much on this statement so I got a bit lost there.
Am I in the right direction to say that it is about detaching ourselves emotionally that may hinder our logical thinking, face and accept the facts and move on in the direction for our own interest?

This means, when we face anything, and i mean anything in our daily life, we have to take a step back at everything and examine, study & analyse the whole pic bit by bit to fulfill the complete pic.
If one's mind is preoccupied with things like how he/she wants the thing to be, EXPECTATIONS, HOPE etc, they will delude themselves into a believer thus lowering their mental state and defenses.
A clearminded person does not live in a world of hope.
He lives in a word of TOTAL clarity, thus seeing a plot even before the 1st stage is set upon him or her.
He/she controls the situation & thus, is able to dictate and break how things go and how things will happen to him/her before it even happens.
Becos he/she is clear, he/she can read a person totally inside out without the person revealing much, thus eyes like can peer thru steel.
Nothing escapes the eyes of a clear minded one.
This is what a Clear Headed Minded person is all about.
People like these are rare, have few friends....namely, you either love them or hate them, cos to the common folk, a clear minded individual is a clear and present danger to them. Thus they'll stay away!!!!

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Originally Posted by DTCEPL

Hiaz....life is always filled with uncertainty, how nice if we can always see whats ahead and plan or be ready for it.

It's possible. Like i explained to bro ekemono.
If you really meditate on this, you'll be surprised how you can see the ending of things even now!
Go try it, you'll be a new person that you will never want to leave once you mastered this.