Long Distance Tirak Relationship - Myth or Reality

[DNAT]

Originally Posted by sex_maniac2

can someone summarise what's posted above?

Oi SM .. is that you (the real 1) .. no choice lah, gotta check on you from time to time cos you got too many clones liao

Originally Posted by DNAT

Oi SM .. is that you (the real 1) .. no choice lah, gotta check on you from time to time cos you got too many clones liao

you try to up me lah. if cannot, that means the original one
my latest clone barely survived one day then die liao, kekeke....

[free]

MY tirak and I have been trying to find ways, especially audio/visual-oriented ones to help sustain our r/s cos we have not seen each other for more than 3 months! Recently we experimented with a hobby of mine - create my own Karaoke Music Videos using available photos we have taken together. It did a for us. I also tried using AVIs captured from Webcams during Internet chats, unfortunately my tirak is not on Web Chat yet

I ended up making several Personalized Karaoke Music Videos for my tirak and some other female friends, I am convinced that is a damn good way to show your darling that you love her and she is special to you. And the audio/visual impact is very intense too.

Picture on left is from PHOTOS taken with my tirak and the one on right is from webcam video captured while Internet chatting with my SYT (normal TG, now in Uni). Left example has only Thai lyrics while right example has Thai and Romanized Thai so if dun know thai can still sing together. If bros interested, u can also have Chinese, Bahasa and other languages.

Click on the pictures to find how more.

[free]

After so many trials and tribulations (and even 2 occasions when I asked her to consider leaving me when I was at the bottom), we have become closer, despite 6 months apart. Each and every call/SMS was precious, bringing us closer in our hearts and minds. Torture it really was, to be so far apart physically and not be able to hold each other when we are sick and needed the other most. The pillow had been a real lousy substitute. This physical separation is perhaps one of the worst things one can experience in a LDTR.

As my tirak reaches the point where she is so sure she wants to be with me, I see her beginning to do things that helps us reach our goals, instead of just waiting passively upon me. Not only had she taken on a 7-days-a week job, she also cuts down on expense drastically so that we can save the money we need to carry out our plans. More importantly, she seek out opportunities and lobangs that we could take advantage of, most of which I could never have found by myself, neither in SG nor in LOS. Unfortunately we were not in a good position to take advantage of most of them and had to let them go. At times it was really discouraging for us, especially her, and I am thankful she had not given up.

Today I was re-paid back for a kind deed I did for a fellow colleague years ago, when I pulled him out from the dump he was in for the 23 years before, cos nobody in management had recognized his talents and contributions to the company - until I came along. We never forgot how I "fought" with HR to double his pay, and ended up with 50% more, which was still unprecedented for an MNC. He was grateful. Now, he helped me cross a narrow bridge my tirak & I were struggling to cross by ourselves, otherwise we could have taken at least 6 months longer, as we were determined not to give up, even it was going to take another 2 or more years. Soon we will reach the other side of the chasm that we faced today, and we can take the last step that we have been dreaming of.

We now move 1 more significant step closer to our dream of a pre-Songkran dateline. We see it now, on the horizon; we can almost smell it. Just a few more months to go. Much hard work is ahead these coming months no doubt, but we know it will be worth it.

My friend, I thank u, that u dun even have any second thoughts when u reached out for me. Nor even expect anything in return. But it is only fair that I do so, when the time comes. Guess the help I offered u eons ago has come 1 complete round. And to think that there is yet another friend wanting to do just the same. Wow, 2 of u appeared at the same time! One good turn does deserve another

Bros, so extend a helping hand to others when u can. U never know when it will come back to u.

Our happpiness? The below sms'es summed it all

Hers: ดิฉันดีใจที่ความฝันของเราจะเป็นจริง รักคุณมากที่รัก
dì-chăn dii jai tîi kwaam făn kɔ̆ɔng rao jà bpən jing rák kun mâak tîi rák
I am happy that our dreams are coming true. Love u lots, darling

Mine: ผมก็ดีใจที่อีกไม่นานเราจะได้เป็นสามีภรรยาจริง ๆ ดิใจถึงไม่มีคำพูดเลย
pŏm gɔ̂ɔ dii jai tîi ìik mâi naan rao jà dâai bpən săa-mii pan-raa-yaa jing jing dì jai tʉ̆ng mâi mii kam pûut ləəi
I am also happy that we can soon become husband & wife for real. I'm so happy I'm at loss for words to tell u

[williamangkh]

....great, that thing are working out for you!

Just a thought...... your plight sound like an acquaintance i know...hmm......

[Cat Man]

Bro Free,

I just came back to the forum after a long hiatus and under a different guise (not that many samsters knew me from the past; only a few prominent old-timers do).

Dunno why so many people flame you for your stories and what you're trying to do here. But I can see that bro bkkguy and bro TV are coming from totally different directions from yours. I think ppl just want to warn you not to live in fantasy.

From reading your posts and your writing style, I figure you for a well-educated guy, probably with executive or professional job. I don't know what your plans are for staying in LOS.

As for myself, I am married to an ex-$40 cat WL, and I live in LOS now on a WP visa and a well-paid professional/executive job.

I don't know what's worth sharing about my experience. Maybe how's this for a start: if you plan to get or can get a well-paid job that requires you to be in decent Thai society, or even the Thai Hi-So, you will have problems. Ppl will ask you how you met yr wife, what she does, etc. and then what are you going to say? The decent Thai society are more snobbish than SG well-educated people looking down on ah beng and ah lian. They'll know a baan nok girl when they see one. I had many problems with my wife in this area.

But if you plan to live on a farm, then better read the thaivisa.com threads well, 'cos you will need to do the "O" visa thing as spouse of Thai citizen or retiree and then you have to prepare the necessary funds (not a lot, but you do need some money in the bank). if you have never worked in Thailand and paid Thai taxes, your chances of eventually getting PR will not be so high.

I can understand with what bro bkkguy is trying to tell you about the "depth aspects" of thai culture. they're nice people, but it can also be frustrating and sometimes even infuriating to live and work amongst them, even if you speak, read and write thai fluently. with your clearly cosmopolitan, well-educated, well-informed world-view/outlook, they will be an alien species to you, and you will be an alien species to them. forget about becoming one of them. no matter how much thai you learn you will always be a foreigner. maybe your look krueng children may be able to integrate into thai culture and society, but you will always be a first generation immigrant and an alien. best you can hope for is that the kway-teow stall bpaa ("auntie", sorry I can't type in Thai) that you always patronise will call you "ah hiah" like they call the local Thai chinese.

i myself have dreams about retiring to an upcountry estate and being a "gentleman farmer", but LOS is not england, australia or new zealand. i sometimes wonder how i will ever integrate into the baan nok community, if ever at all.

just my 2 satang's worth

[bkkguy]

Originally Posted by Cat Man

I can understand with what bro bkkguy is trying to tell you about the "depth aspects" of thai culture. they're nice people, but it can also be frustrating and sometimes even infuriating to live and work amongst them, even if you speak, read and write thai fluently. with your clearly cosmopolitan, well-educated, well-informed world-view/outlook, they will be an alien species to you, and you will be an alien species to them. forget about becoming one of them. no matter how much thai you learn you will always be a foreigner. maybe your look krueng children may be able to integrate into thai culture and society, but you will always be a first generation immigrant and an alien. best you can hope for is that the kway-teow stall bpaa ("auntie", sorry I can't type in Thai) that you always patronise will call you "ah hiah" like they call the local Thai chinese.

Actually they (thai) treat us better if you tell them that you're from overseas.
Never ! Never try to be a smart Alex to teach them how to do thing YOUR ways. The thai have their own way of handling their domestic/family issues. You either agree with them or you just 'keep the mouth shut'.

Thai ppls like HUMBLE person. Don’t try to boast too much or compare things in front of them. They are, after all, very jealous person whether it is a thai lady or thai guy. If you can, once a while does flatter them a bit, they will try you better next time.

Originally Posted by Cat Man

i myself have dreams about retiring to an upcountry estate and being a "gentleman farmer", but LOS is not england, australia or new zealand. i sometimes wonder how i will ever integrate into the baan nok community, if ever at all.
just my 2 satang's worth

Try to get your thai PR first after your 3 years of WP in bkk. After that, everythings will be easy.If you've alots of money in the bank, that of course do help you integrate faster into their thai community.

[free]

Originally Posted by Cat Man

Bro Free,

I just came back to the forum after a long hiatus and under a different guise (not that many samsters knew me from the past; only a few prominent old-timers do).

Dunno why so many people flame you for your stories and what you're trying to do here. But I can see that bro bkkguy and bro TV are coming from totally different directions from yours. I think ppl just want to warn you not to live in fantasy.

From reading your posts and your writing style, I figure you for a well-educated guy, probably with executive or professional job. I don't know what your plans are for staying in LOS.

As for myself, I am married to an ex-$40 cat WL, and I live in LOS now on a WP visa and a well-paid professional/executive job.

I don't know what's worth sharing about my experience. Maybe how's this for a start: if you plan to get or can get a well-paid job that requires you to be in decent Thai society, or even the Thai Hi-So, you will have problems. Ppl will ask you how you met yr wife, what she does, etc. and then what are you going to say? The decent Thai society are more snobbish than SG well-educated people looking down on ah beng and ah lian. They'll know a baan nok girl when they see one. I had many problems with my wife in this area.

But if you plan to live on a farm, then better read the thaivisa.com threads well, 'cos you will need to do the "O" visa thing as spouse of Thai citizen or retiree and then you have to prepare the necessary funds (not a lot, but you do need some money in the bank). if you have never worked in Thailand and paid Thai taxes, your chances of eventually getting PR will not be so high.

I can understand with what bro bkkguy is trying to tell you about the "depth aspects" of thai culture. they're nice people, but it can also be frustrating and sometimes even infuriating to live and work amongst them, even if you speak, read and write thai fluently. with your clearly cosmopolitan, well-educated, well-informed world-view/outlook, they will be an alien species to you, and you will be an alien species to them. forget about becoming one of them. no matter how much thai you learn you will always be a foreigner. maybe your look krueng children may be able to integrate into thai culture and society, but you will always be a first generation immigrant and an alien. best you can hope for is that the kway-teow stall bpaa ("auntie", sorry I can't type in Thai) that you always patronise will call you "ah hiah" like they call the local Thai chinese.

i myself have dreams about retiring to an upcountry estate and being a "gentleman farmer", but LOS is not england, australia or new zealand. i sometimes wonder how i will ever integrate into the baan nok community, if ever at all.

just my 2 satang's worth

Thanks, I appreciate your advice. I do know that the thais are polite people and they dun like ppl who are loud (and boss around) - been working with thai ppl on business since 1989. I think so far I never had problems getting along.

I do go to Thaivisa.com a lot, and made several friends on the way. I am getting myself familiar as much as possible with what is to come. What u have described regarding the baan nok ger, perhaps maybe less of a problem for us, cos in most if not literally all aspects, my tirak looks, lives and behaves like a normal TG now. And also hold a ordinary job.

We are exploring together what we can do for the coming future, and we are taking it each step at a time, slowly perhaps but surely for sure. Hopefully over the next 6-9 months, things will fall in place for us... come what may. Not the easiest of routes to take, but we are both happy with what we have chosen together. Hope it will last and we are working hard to make it so.

[singrakthai]

Originally Posted by bkkguy

Actually they (thai) treat us better if you tell them that you're from overseas.
Never ! Never try to be a smart Alex to teach them how to do thing YOUR ways. The thai have their own way of handling their domestic/family issues. You either agree with them or you just 'keep the mouth shut'..

Good morning! I see u're here every morning too.. hehehe... I totally agree with u. My buyers are polite to me, but they're very nasty to my Thai staffs...
Just yesterday a S'porean friend told me his Thai customer told him he thinks his fellow Thai are lazy workers... I smsed him back to tell him to just keep quiet and smile... hehehe

Originally Posted by bkkguy

Thai ppls like HUMBLE person. Don’t try to boast too much or compare things in front of them. They are, after all, very jealous person whether it is a thai lady or thai guy. If you can, once a while does flatter them a bit, they will try you better next time.

Originally Posted by bkkguy

Try to get your thai PR first after your 3 years of WP in bkk. After that, everythings will be easy.If you've alots of money in the bank, that of course do help you integrate faster into their thai community.

How much is alot? hehehe

[bkkguy]

Originally Posted by singrakthai

Good morning! I see u're here every morning too.. hehehe... I totally agree with u. My buyers are polite to me, but they're very nasty to my Thai staffs...
Just yesterday a S'porean friend told me his Thai customer told him he thinks his fellow Thai are lazy workers... I smsed him back to tell him to just keep quiet and smile... hehehe

Yes! The Land Of Smiles.

Originally Posted by singrakthai

How much is alot? hehehe

As much $$ as possible !
Single and married man, all have their own different needs and wants.
Who will complain of 'too much of money' one, tio bo.

[singrakthai]

Originally Posted by Cat Man

I don't know what's worth sharing about my experience. Maybe how's this for a start: if you plan to get or can get a well-paid job that requires you to be in decent Thai society, or even the Thai Hi-So, you will have problems. Ppl will ask you how you met yr wife, what she does, etc. and then what are you going to say? The decent Thai society are more snobbish than SG well-educated people looking down on ah beng and ah lian. They'll know a baan nok girl when they see one. I had many problems with my wife in this area.

Just smile and tell them u know the girl from internet.. haha.. wait a minute... u got any hi-so lady friends to intro?

[singrakthai]

Originally Posted by bkkguy

Yes! The Land Of Smiles.

ya, man.. don't know? just smile.. don't understand? just smile... not sure? just smile.. Embarrassed? just smile... Angry? smile also! More like land of (fake) smiles...

Originally Posted by bkkguy

As much $$ as possible !
Single and married man, all have their own different needs and wants.
Who will complain of 'too much of money' one, tio bo.

Alot of ppl think living cost of living in Thailand is very low.. but i think it still depends on the life style u're going to have. If like u, have to send kids to international school, having 3 kids.. i think living expenses still quite high... of cos if compared to S'pore maybe its still lower... but then if its in S'pore, most people probably have double income whereas husband and wife both working. But if u're in Thailand, u'll probably be the 1 and only breadwinner. Somemore no CPF to help u pay for housing installments....

[Cat Man]

Originally Posted by bkkguy

Actually they (thai) treat us better if you tell them that you're from overseas.

bro bkkguy, you are rite. when i first got my thai language to a working level, I tried to "blend in", but after talking to other s'poreans living here, I learnt that being "khon dtaang chaat" has more prestige. anyway, after speaking thai so many years, my thai colleagues say I still have a Chinese "ah hiah" accent, so I've given up blending in.

Never ! Never try to be a smart Alex to teach them how to do thing YOUR ways. The thai have their own way of handling their domestic/family issues. You either agree with them or you just 'keep the mouth shut'.

yep. and also their own way of handling work issues. i just try to go along and not change things, although sometimes my innate s'porean efficiency mentality gets the better of me and i get quite frustrated. but my ang moh colleagues lagi frustrated!


Thai ppls like HUMBLE person. Don’t try to boast too much or compare things in front of them. They are, after all, very jealous person whether it is a thai lady or thai guy. If you can, once a while does flatter them a bit, they will try you better next time.


Try to get your thai PR first after your 3 years of WP in bkk. After that, everythings will be easy.If you've alots of money in the bank, that of course do help you integrate faster into their thai community.

err..are you saying they accept you better if they think you have a lot of money? I know thais are status conscious, but I often wonder where to draw the line. I'm worried if I retire to the countryside showing that I am a rich foreigner, ppl will either rob me or come borrow money from me. Just last week I went to visit my in-laws at the moobaan with my missus and during TCSS session with the neighbours, one guy openly asked me how much I earn. Lucky my missus siam the question by saying "not much, just enough to get by sabai sabai".

as for PR, I still have 1 more year to go before I hit 3 years. from your experience, are there a lot of s'poreans applying for PR each year? Under the regulations, I think the quota is still 100 approvals per nationality per year. I wonder whether there are so many s'poreans applying each year?

[Cat Man]

[QUOTE=singrakthai]
Just yesterday a S'porean friend told me his Thai customer told him he thinks his fellow Thai are lazy workers... I smsed him back to tell him to just keep quiet and smile... hehehe

I think if I earn Thai salary I will be lazy also

I just found out recently that my ang moh (american) colleague doing the same work makes twice my salary. see beh tu lan, make me feel like being lazy oreddy

[Cat Man]

Originally Posted by singrakthai

Just smile and tell them u know the girl from internet.. haha.. wait a minute... u got any hi-so lady friends to intro?

wah lan eh, my wife doesn't even know how to use a computer, how to meet on the internet??

got lau cha boh ai mai? haven't got to meet their daughters yet