My Fillial Daughter

[siamcutey]

Originally Posted by Bangkok Master

I like your quote very much, you're rite man! I think if we decide to stay in Thailand we should adapt ourselves totally being a thai. Only thing to retain is your S'pore passport!

I can eat, sleep, drink and FUCK like a THAI, but I cannot bring myself to THINK like one.

Example, if you have a thai wife who is once a WL. The wife tell you that she work in flesh trade and everyday you go drive her to work and pick her up after work. Can or not? If can, I tell you are 101% convert to THAI already.

The LAND OF SMILES will receive you with OPEN ARMS.

SC

[subband]

I was wondering beside giving the thai girls their monthly allowance, how much do you give your parents anyway?? Is it equal??

I have been to BKK for work on few occasions, mixing around with those from 'decent' girls and guys. Every trip, I learn something new about the thai way.
This is what my fellow thai engineer say to me. In thailand, many men keep mia noi, or small wives. In thailand, the ratio of girls to boys is high, chances of meeting girls in social gathering is very easy.
This is his advice on foreigners meeting thai girls: Never hand to them $$ when they ask for it. If she really love u, she will never ask $$ from you or give threat to work in MP or FL. If you have $$ to give away, might as well give to your aging parents better. Why give away to a woman who u are even not close of??

[siamcutey]

Originally Posted by subband

I was wondering beside giving the thai girls their monthly allowance, how much do you give your parents anyway?? Is it equal??

I have been to BKK for work on few occasions, mixing around with those from 'decent' girls and guys. Every trip, I learn something new about the thai way.
This is what my fellow thai engineer say to me. In thailand, many men keep mia noi, or small wives. In thailand, the ratio of girls to boys is high, chances of meeting girls in social gathering is very easy.
This is his advice on foreigners meeting thai girls: Never hand to them $$ when they ask for it. If she really love u, she will never ask $$ from you or give threat to work in MP or FL. If you have $$ to give away, might as well give to your aging parents better. Why give away to a woman who u are even not close of??

Yeah correct. If I am going to give the girl and her family 80K baht monthly, I will have to give my parents the same amount at least to justify. Which comes to 160K baht monthly. I think I go die better. No problems and headaches.

160K baht for them not counting my own expenses. Wah almost $7K SGD for them monthly. If I die, how?

hahaha
SC

[Luna]

Originally Posted by subband

If you have $$ to give away, might as well give to your aging parents better. Why give away to a woman who u are even not close of??

Your this sentence is very meaningful & enlightening.

[subband]

Originally Posted by Bangkok Master

I like your quote very much, you're rite man! I think if we decide to stay in Thailand we should adapt ourselves totally being a thai. Only thing to retain is your S'pore passport!

Retaining of s'pore is very important, in my opinion. Singapore will be home for us, if not most of us after all. If you travel around extensively, just look around u and compared all the asian cities. Just look at bangkok, the amount of cars and noise pollution. I would love to be in BKK always if not for the road traffics!!

[Bangkok Master]

Originally Posted by subband

I was wondering beside giving the thai girls their monthly allowance, how much do you give your parents anyway?? Is it equal??

I would say that it was quite a rash decision for me to stay in Bangkok but at that point of time, I was retrenched and my girl was persuading me to try in Bangkok. So intially I wanted to open a shop in Koh Samet, Rayong but due to some problems it wasn't successful so decided to head for Bangkok instead. I already knew that I had to support my thai gf maybe the family as well way before I came but I never expect to spend so much until I experienced "THAI CULTURE". I also sent $$$ to my mum but sometimes I realise I had not been a fillial child as I was in S'pore before. I finally realise why my friends had told me to think carefully before taking a tirak cos it's very expensive......JING JING! I'm actually thinking when I finish my contract with my boss, I would go home to make up the loss time with my mum.

[free]

Originally Posted by siamcutey

The girl tell me after she ROD, the only way she will quit is that she wants 50K for the family monthly. On top of that, the 50K given to her family does not include her own expenses in BKK. So plus minus BKK expenses for herself, that will come up to another 20-30K.
The family stay in province and I haven't seen the family. You ask me 50K baht in province spend on what, I also don't know. The one thing I know is 50K baht to the thais is like $5000 to us in Singapore.

I dun know your exact situation, but if my tirak even open mouth to ask me for 50k monthly & cannot justify it, she won't be my tirak anymore. Where got give her chance to negotiate with a lower figure? IF she truly loves me she won't be ripping me off, cos she would be affected too (she shold know where I stand financially and will not hold back if I can afford cos she knows I believe in sharing).

Even if the case is genuine, I still cannot carry on, cos it would mean I am out of her league. I am experiencing a genuine case (one gal who loves me lost her high-paying stock-broker job), and she is a wonderful woman - actually my dream gal (also oldest at 34) & still is. I can see exactly where the 50k monthly will go to, and they are all valid. And until she has the chance to find enough capital to do her own biz (which she is capable of), I can't afford to help her fully with her level of commitmentm, which in the short term cannot be brought down. She has no choice but to let the finance company take back her car, and maybe her 2nd home in CM (cos still under financing). Maybe keep only her current CR house, lose everything else. Plus father in ICU after brain surgery, and got not enough money to pay, She never had it so tough before.

Since I can't help her, I got to withdraw so that other ppl who can help her and like her can have a chance if she opens her heart to them. All these while she has been rejecting the 2 suitors (I talked to one, a Swiss bizman, her shares-trading customer in old company) who were already there wooing her before I even came into her life, and they still have not given up. Tonite we cried together as we talked on phone. I asked her to forget me and accept the Swiss friend (I know he is a good man), and loves her very much, even if it was one-sided. She cried even more. Sigh, if only I had met her 1 yr ago, timing would have been right.

From the above, I think it is clear that if I cannot afford my tirak, she is not right for me, and vice versa. Dun even need to consider whether she is good or not. Can't afford, period. Struggling on would make the lives of both tougher, for one can'r live on love alone. I will chose the one who can live within our means.

As for hospital, it depends. My tirak goes to both, depending on the problem. But mostly to government one. Even then, a lot depends on whether they qualify for subsidies. Also whether I am comfortable with the govt one or not. for that particular situation.

[free]

Originally Posted by Bangkok Master

Maybe my gf isn't mature enough or she has too many friends instigating her. Like for one instance, she forced me to finance her new honda jazz even the old toyota vios is just 3 yrs old. I realise by commiting the mistake which will further cosequences is wrong but I was commited to her so I guess we men tends to make foolish decisions sometimes.

Yeah, I think I am quite lucky then. I was telling my tirak about my thinking of buying a car if I stay in LOS. And if I can work from home, she may get to drive it often when I am not using. But she must go get driving licence 1st. She said "then dun buy new one cos if she bang here bang there cos not so experienced yet, she sure heart-pain" I, of course said good idea lah.

[Bangkok Master]

50k baht for monthly family allowance??? Is her family the 4 division army battalion? If the family consist more than 10 person, I will agreed that is reasonable. Unless you're a wealthy businessman, I think it's difficult for one to finance the amount. I came across a Jap old man paying a Mamasan working in Thaniya 60k baht a month and do you know where the $$$ goes?
To the new Honda CRV, shopping and to her young and handsome gigolo boyfriend. How do I know this cos she's seating next to me in the internet cafe which I patronise everyday!

I would say 50k baht allowance for staying in province is way too much unless you are staying in Bangkok which the cost of living is higher!

[free]

Originally Posted by Bangkok Master

I would say 50k baht allowance for staying in province is way too much unless you are staying in Bangkok which the cost of living is higher!

Woaah, even in BKK, 50k for a normal family is way too much, if the family can understand the meaning of greng jai. Unless maybe father & mother cannot work, all the many siblings too young and schooling, plus dun know what man? Fully air-coned house, a nice car? Live in a nice Apartment with high rental macham Ratchada Orchid or what?

I see the home of my ex (Rain)'s parents and now my tirak, I have to say "heng heng". I am glad I found gals who are in the same league as me - called "normal" class.

[siamcutey]

Originally Posted by Bangkok Master

50k baht for monthly family allowance??? Is her family the 4 division army battalion? If the family consist more than 10 person, I will agreed that is reasonable. Unless you're a wealthy businessman, I think it's difficult for one to finance the amount. I came across a Jap old man paying a Mamasan working in Thaniya 60k baht a month and do you know where the $$$ goes?
To the new Honda CRV, shopping and to her young and handsome gigolo boyfriend. How do I know this cos she's seating next to me in the internet cafe which I patronise everyday!

I would say 50k baht allowance for staying in province is way too much unless you are staying in Bangkok which the cost of living is higher!

hahaha, if the family is in the 4 division army battalion, i sure marry the daughter cos I will have a lot of back door dealings with the "help of army backing." Want get projects, contracts, sub-contracts also easy. Black White all can do.
But the problem is she isn't. kekeke

50K for family, 10 people, 1 person 5K baht, that means all waiting for me to feed. Needs I can help, wants, I cannot help.

50K baht for housing loan, car loan in BKK, easily understandable. In NE province, I better reserve comments till I see the family. If the family is out to "con" me, and I love the daughter very much, I think I rather take 500K baht, 1 time pay 10 times amount, finish them off and everything solved.

Just a joke. But nevertheless, many do said its a good idea.

hahaha
SC

[siamcutey]

Originally Posted by free

Woaah, even in BKK, 50k for a normal family is way too much, if the family can understand the meaning of greng jai. Unless maybe father & mother cannot work, all the many siblings too young and schooling, plus dun know what man? Fully air-coned house, a nice car? Live in a nice Apartment with high rental macham Ratchada Orchid or what?

I see the home of my ex (Rain)'s parents and now my tirak, I have to say "heng heng". I am glad I found gals who are in the same league as me - called "normal" class.

Ratchada Orchid is only considered Ex in Ratchada. If go sukhumvit, die....

SC

[free]

Originally Posted by siamcutey

50K baht for housing loan, car loan in BKK, easily understandable. In NE province, I better reserve comments till I see the family. If the family is out to "con" me, and I love the daughter very much, I think I rather take 500K baht, 1 time pay 10 times amount, finish them off and everything solved.

Just a joke. But nevertheless, many do said its a good idea.

SC

SC, I think u kinder than me leh. In my mind I am thinking, if they really love their daughter, and wants her to happy with the man who loves her, how can they expect him to pay for housing loan, car loan, whatever, esp if in BKK, where public transport is available? In other words, rip him off?

If help to pay for rent for small but good enough place, motorbike installment (already some gals tell me luxury liao, cos they used to taking bus, and only if no choice taxi sometimes), schooling for siblings, and necessities, still understandable. I think my ex (Rain)'s family has given me a good idea of how much a reasonable family expenses are, and the acceptable living conditions they experience. Even when I was with Rain, they did not ask for a quantum leap in standard of living. In fact they din ask for anything - what I gave was out of my own discretion, and accepted with sincere gratitude. I learnt the real meaning of Greng Jai.

[free]

Originally Posted by thaivisitor

50K to thais in the village is not like $5,000 in SG, more like $20,000.

Bro TV, I was wondering;

Dancer's parents makes an average of 3k to 3.5k max a month from their fruit farm. There are the 2 of them, her elder sister and her daughter. Brother working elsewhere makes only enough to support himself and maybe send a bit home once in a while. On top of that, after we separated, she had to ask her dad for a bit occasionally if she really cannot earn enough from her part-time work to pay for her Uni fees and expenses. She said only asked him for an average of less than 500 Baht a month. I know they have an old house (zinc roof) that leaks a bit if the rain is too heavy. They have an old but usable motorbike. None of the family members drink nor gamble. All I had bought for them was a cheapo washing m/c (3k baht) and a shower heater (1.2k baht), and had to spend quite a whle persuading them to accept. When we met in Chiangrai, I drove them to a cosy (but not expensive) restaurant. I remembered how her mum was shocked at the prices, saying very expensive and daren't even order. I was amazed that it was the 1st time they had been to a "proper" restaurant.

It's very hard for me to put myself into their shoes. I can imagine life must be hard, working on the farm from about 7.30am till about 6.30pm everyday, unless he has to go elsewhere to run important errands. Because it is very hot at the farm (is that why both are dark while Dancer is fair?), he will not bring his hp (my very old dis-used Nokia 6110) cos he does not want to spoil it. He hardly makes calls, mostly takes incoming. So uncontactable by hp often during daytime. Once he fell and no one knew! Never once have I heard her dad or mum complain that life is tough. or they want goodies or money, even though I talked to her parents average once a fortnight, and they are already very comfortable with me. In fact they always said they are contented, and happy cos their family is close and loving. And thank me for my concern and for loving Dancer (still dun know we have sort of separated for a while)

Do you know what kind of life (the standard of living, etc) the familly leads given the above situation, since you may be familiar with Chiangcome? Based on my contacts with a few other TGs in Phayao and Chiangrai, most seem to be better off as they could at least pay for their daughters' Uni and thus they dun need to work part-time.

Guess I will have a better idea when I visit Film's mother & her fruit farm in Phayao.

[free]

Originally Posted by siamcutey

Ratchada Orchid is only considered Ex in Ratchada. If go sukhumvit, die....

SC

can understand. Like stay in Ratchada city hotel = 800B. Go Sukhumvit area, stay at cheapo place also 1500B already. Anyway my point is one can rent a 1 room (all in one room - no kitchen) apartment at R Orchid for 8k-10k monthly or one get an apartment with 2 bedroom, 1 living room and 1 kitchen for < 6k. It's how to how the TG & her family want to spend what they see as someone's money (cos he's an outsider, so who cares), or it is part of the family's money, cos they see their daughter's tirak as her probable hubby-to-be and thus part of the family. Have seen and met both groups. Stay away from 1, but spend time to get to know the other.