#4021
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
QUOTE=cmelater;12970234]Money is a dangerous allurement..... a man who is a potential carrot.
Clamouring over a gal and even begging her are both very wrong things to do...................... A friend once shared with me that he like his viet gal a lot and he had never overspent on this gal. His reasoning is that making a girl love him (rather than his money) is far more tenable than showering material gifts. Honestly, if its material gifts, there are too many competitors. How to beat the rest of the men? My view is, be your own man, than to bow to the woman. The bros (esp WB) will understand my point. The man to have his own stand. Never be in a rush to get the "deal done". What for. Expending large amounts of funds and time are not sure fire ways to close the deal. A relationship is like a plant. Both require time to nurture and grow.[/QUOTE] Bro cmelater, Thanks for ur excellent post. "A relationship is like a plant. Both require time to nurture and grow." I'll remember that. Cheers! Bro WB Quote:
Bro risingup, Read the post by bro cmelater below. I think what you do is not as important as your right mindset. You must believe you hv higher social n sexual value than the girl. You don't chase her, you qualify her. You must show some interest in her, but must not care too much n she can take it or leave it... Always remain relaxed, unflappable n detached, especially facing stressful situations n adversity. She is always watching u (mostly at the subconscious level). A girl or woman is always watching n testing her man to see whether he has the right stuff (emotional mastery n mental toughness), whether he has been w/ her 3 hrs or 30 years. It's hard wired in her genes...for the safety n survival of herself n her kids. There was a girl who told me she had rejected a customer who offered 5K for ST. The mummy was very unhappy w/ her, kept calling her...the customer was very furious but won't give up. I don't know what she said was true or not. That is not important, the point is that if a girl rejects u, the right attitude is to remain as cool as cucumber. She may say yes the next day haha. I hv had more than a few girls who hung up on me...who later became my mistress, after several weeks to over a year. Cheers! Bro WB Quote:
Good post. Tks for sharing. Cheers! Bro WB |
#4022
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
Good afternoon!
Not long ago I reconnected w/ a long lost bro, YJ. He is a well known samster who is purportedly very experienced in "bedding" singers but recently has chosen to retire from local night scene n has immigrated to a foreign country. In bro YJ's opinion, I hv done well in my preferred field or comfort zone n I should move up to BY-ing singers. He believes that will be a real challenge n a real test of manhood as I'll be competing w/ many wealthy n experienced contenders. Must move out of my comfort zone, according to him. Apparently he has done all that n has achieved the ultimate conquests, so he is happy to retire. I had another chat w/ him several days later in which I outlined my goals n desires which are radically different from his... I disagreed w/ bro YJ completely on many points. He said he wasn't offended. Good for him. If true, he has earned my respect as a man w/ good emotional control. I wish him all the best. BTW, I hv learned a lot from him in my formative yrs in 2009 n 2010...Thanks bro YJ! First, I like to comment on Bro YJ's voluntary "retirement." I'll never "retire" from making love to SYTS who are attractive to me. BTW, I'm a lao chee ko pek, whereas bro YJ is much, much younger, only middle-aged. He is many years from reaching his sexual prime because I'm only beginning to get close to mine. For me, to retire is to give up living, give up life. And, I don't dwell on past achievements or past glories. I only live in the present. The past doesn't exist, nor does the future. What I hv and what everyone has is the present moment, that is all. Even if you were at one time the Emperor of China, so what? No use if you're now a waiter and living incognito in Sg or in Argentina. Even if u hv fxked all the famous super models, beauty queens and actresses, so what? It's what you're NOW as a MAN, physically, emotionally, psychologically n spiritually, that really matters. I learn from the past n I plan for the future, but this should take only a few minutes a day. Don't spend hours, like most people. Moreover, what is great success to bro YJ or anyone else may mean absolutely nothing to me. To each his own. Some may think I'm a failure because I'm not a Nobel laureate in Physics or I'm not an American board certified neurosurgeon. Some may think a person is successful only if he is the richest man in the world. I hv this to say, since our earth is a pale blue dot, being numero uno in anything in our world doesn't amount to very much. http://www.planetary.org/explore/spa...-blue-dot.html I know my circle of competence but I never stay in my comfort zone. I'm expanding my circle of competence in ALL directions, every minute, every day. Everything is changing, the whole universe is changing, and we must change w/ it. If a man is wishing for status quo or trying to stay in his comfort zone, whoever he is n wherever he is, he is finished, kaput. Back to why I shun hanging flowers... 1) Hanging flowers and getting into flower wars is for BIG SUCKERS aka patsies. Sorry for being so blunt, but I'm dead serious. The fiction cost is exorbitant n it would be THE most inefficient way to get the girls /women of my type. It's more abt boosting my fragile ego and showing off than abt the singers. Moreover, there are "fake flowers," fraud and money laundering, not something I want to get involved in any way. 2) By hanging big flowers and competing w/ other patrons for the singers, I'm announcing that I'm a chaser and that they hv higher social n sexual value than me. It's the same as putting big signs on my head and scream: Please look at me, I'm inferior, I'm insecure n I'm hanging big flowers so that you will notice me, because I'm a born loser, I don't believe I deserve you n I hv nothing else to offer u. This unmanly, needy n wussy behaviour is most repulsive to the subconscious minds of the girls. Of course I'll get their pussies if I hang enough but it will be extremely difficult to overcome their initial negative (mostly subconscious) perceptions of me. Even if subsequently I could give them PVOs again n again, it would not be enough to get them addicted. 3) The timing of HFJs is inconvenient for me as I sleep early. I go to SH at KTVs only twice a month n I always leave before midnight. "Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise." 4) It's very difficult to judge the physical attractiveness of singers inside the HFJs because of the lighting, hairdo, make up and long evening gowns which cover their thighs and legs. But they can't fool me. I like to see a girl's bare thighs n legs clearly in broad daylight before BY-ing. Mummy J used to arrange my prospective mistresses to meet me in hot pants during the day haha. 5) Most successful singers are ruthless psychopaths and/or sociopaths w/ narcissistic personality disorder. They are poisons to me. What is one's goal or endpoint w/ them? Can't define success unless you hv a clear n well defined goal. ST or BY? Beat out all the other customers to get their pussies? Or get them emotionally n sexually addicted? Marry one of them? Become a gigolo to them? 6) Singers are usually here only 6 months n it's difficult for them to return for the next 12 months. If I like a girl, I like to keep her long term, until she becomes unattractive to me. Six months is just to short if a pussy is exquisite. I also like to comment on several health myths. Myth 1: A man reaches his sexual peak at 18-19. Nonsense. I hv yet to reach my peak. Myth 2: It's normal for a man to gain weight as he gets older. Nonsense. My weight n waistline are the same as when I was 21. Look at Chen Lifu n Kirk Kerkorian. Google them. Myth 3: It's normal for a man's BP to go up as he ages. Again, nonsense. My BP is actually slightly lower than when I was 21. And I don't take any medications. Last but not least, how do I find time to go to HFJs? I don't even hv time to go to Shanghai where a lucrative business deal and several delectable high school/uni students hv been waiting for me. Cheers! Bro WB Last edited by warbird; 07-05-2015 at 02:04 PM. |
#4023
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
Good afternoon,
I'll hv an outing to Lido Palace, next to Holiday Inn, Outram n Havelock rd, tomorrow Friday for HH, from 6 to 930 PM. For light drinkers n those willing to smoke outside the rm. Expected expense per pax is $70 to 90. Booking for a girl is $200 n up. No butterfly. PM or SMS me if interested. BTW, girls at LIdo are supposed to be the most attractive in SG. Cheers! Bro WB _________________ |
#4024
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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#4025
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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Good to hear from u. Cheers! Bro WB ............................................. Good morning! Many bros and many girls refer to any marriage as a happy ending. I couldn't disagree more. I would say the trouble has just begun haha. Give them 10 years or 30 years and see if they are still happy. No, give them 50 years... The fact that many bros here are married should tell us something. BTW, more than 50% of all legal wives cheat n they are much better in hiding their affairs. I know a semi-retired Ang Moh retina specialist in Gotham City who is 69. He told me his parents are 92 n hv been married 70 yrs! I think that is co-dependency, a commitment type of love. Good for them! Very, very rare indeed. But I'm not sure how happy their marriage has been. Let me talk abt another related subject. Many bros talk abt upping or BY-ing this girl or that Ang Pai singer. But we should remember the following. If a man is willing to spend sufficient money, getting a pretty pussy of his type, provided he has a chance to see n meet her, is easy. Owning her pussy may be enough for most men, whether it's exclusive to him or not. But if he is to progress to much higher levels of satisfaction and fulfillment, he needs to own her heart and soul, that is what living a full life for a man is all about. To do that, he needs to accomplish two things, both has NOTHING to do w/ money or spending money. 1) Demonstrate his awesome emotional and self mastery to her, which will take some time. 2) And he has to give her frequent copulatory vaginal orgasms ( PVOs or CVOs ) until she is emotionally n sexually addicted to him. This will also take some time. Then and only then, she will have a very difficult time leaving him, even if he treats her badly or cheats on her. [Grin][Grin] Your comments and criticisms will be appreciated. Cheers! Bro WB |
#4026
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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Hi Bro WB, Awesome to hear from you again, as per your question, yes I am below 30 years old. Perhaps even the correct side of 20. Very young and inexperienced indeed, I have a long way to learn. I agree wholeheartedly with your above comments that under no circumstance should we throw money blindly, buying pussy is and will always be a repulsive act To women consciously or subconsciously.... I will disclose below about my current and ongoing endeavour. Some interesting points to note about my real life happenings which some brothers here may learn from. Interestingly if you have read bro wb's previous post you will see a recurrence of certain points he has made. Body language, tone of voice and touch are very instrumental in succeeding with not just women, but all things in life. I have been to a HFJ after work sometime recent, it was my first time at HFJ and immediately I befriended a lady, with her approaching me. she kept me company throughout. I was there to just catch up with my buddies and was not looking for anything. My body language was that I was not impressed by her even though she was a looker. I never once did sit facing her and to an extent even ignore her when she and my buddies were vying for conversation, I spoke to my buddies. haha. I texted her the next day and she seems to be most certainly surprised and happy that I remember her. We switch joints after and at the new joint. a new girl approached me again and started tagging, hugging and smooching me all over. To my amusement.. i have yet to contact this one. note for the 1st lady, I did go down for a drink in her joint unannounced for the 2nd time. Her friends recognized me and immediately, after notifying her she came to my side again. Her body language on the 2nd visit was much more positive and I know I can execute, will she be lucky enough to be branded mine? I did enjoy the show watching other patrons hang her flowers. In both days I have never hung flowers at all, and damage per day was only 30sgd. I am a miser. Haha I shall update more if there is any updates...
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伤我不要紧 来日换我犹有余刃 做大事要狠 Last edited by abugga; 18-05-2015 at 01:28 PM. |
#4027
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
Not asking us to be gigolo but there are some tips how to make the woman willing to die for a man! Is a successful gigolo considered manly and owning self mastery? |
#4028
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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Thanks for sharing your real life experiences. You're light yrs ahead of ur peers in terms of ur understandings of man-woman RS. Pls keep us updated on ur exploits. Cheers! Bro WB Quote:
You hv asked a fantastic question. I'll give a full reply later as I'm just too busy now. Suffice to say that a MAN would never choose to be a gigolo as a career or life long pursue. He is a great lover, a great provider and he protects his women. However, when a man w/ great masculine character traits n emotional mastery finds himself down on his luck,TEMPORARILY, it's certainly ok to accept whatever help from his girls. He will make a strong come back, financially, and in ALL other areas of his life. This is a given and all the girls know that. In other words, a career gigolo is NOT a MAN. And his women will flock to and become addicted to a real MAN, if they are very lucky to find one. Cheers! Bro WB |
#4029
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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My peers........ most are a futile bunch.. I believe most of them strongly believe that good looks and deep pockets are a requirement in attracting women. I cannot fathom their mindset. I have even given them certain advice but they do not want to try or even listen. I have since stopped listening or talking about their women woes. Haha. I rather project my time and energy in my own hobbies and women. As for updates: we are unofficially a couple haha. Much to the envy of my peers.... if only they can Man up! We go out have dinner, sit at cafes and watch time go by. Enjoying the touch and warmth of each others bodies. I have yet to bed her. that can wait. How are you otherwise? Do take care of your health as many including I have recently fallen ill to the annual cold. Cheers
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伤我不要紧 来日换我犹有余刃 做大事要狠 |
#4030
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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Make the best of your youth. You're young only once. My health is fantastic for a man my age. My BP, weight and waistline are the same as when I was 20. Actually, my BP of 110/70 is better than when I was 20. I'm not on any medications except the judicious use of a very small dose of Cialis. I may not need to take it. I make love 25 sessions or more a month, a lot more than when I was 20. Cheers! Bro WB .................................................. . Good morning! I just replied to a bro on my other thread. It's abt life n marriage. <<<<<<<<<<<<<<Bro hehehaha, Well said. Only those who are or hv been married can fully understand... Marriage is NOT an end, it's the beginning of a long, often tough and painful journey plagued by the vicissitudes of life. Look at your beautiful 18 yo bride now, supposing you're around 20, can you imagine spending the next 60 to 70 yrs w/ her? God bless if both of u can stay healthy for such long time. But can u visualize her when she is 40, 50, 60 or 70 yrs old? Still want to make love to her frequently? I'm a man, a lao chee ko pek, but I greatly enjoy making love to girls who are 18-24. My two current full mistresses are aged 18 n 22. And I hv many other GFs, both here n in China n elsewhere. These girls keep me healthy, youthful, energetic n optimistic. Every area of my life has improved and is improving. That is what life is all about. I may not be satisfied w/ them n will look for better genes to hv kids with. No, I'm not apologetic. On the contrary, I'm fulfilling my duty and obligations of a filial great...grandson to my ancestors. I know they love and approve of me. This is great karma. Cheers! Bro WB >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> |
#4031
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
Good morning!
I just answered a bro's questions on BY-ing girls. Bro, It varies, from 6K to 15K a month if the girl doesn't work at the night scene n doesn't see any other men. She must be at my beck and call. She is a full time mistress. The damage doesn't include rental of master bedroom/studio, visa fees, school tuition, meals and gifts (optional). The lower range is generally for girls whom I import directly from China. They hv much lower expectations and often dare not come unless they come in pairs. Of course, more experienced and professional ones may ask for more. But everything is subject to negotiation. In the last 7 yrs, I hv caught sight of only one girl KP in SG who is worth more than 15K a month in SG. I met her early last yr when I went to lease a master bedroom for my Fujian lao po WX at City Square, who was due to return to SG in 2 days. KP was kept by a man at the time n was going to leave SG in 10 days. WX had to stay in a junior master for a wk first. So they did meet. This is what WX said abt KP: 年轻漂亮, 高挑,很白。他男朋友大约40 岁。Never met her man. She had natural looks w/ no make up n no facial surgery. If I ever see KP or someone equally attractive, anywhere in the world, I'll make an offer she can't refuse. BTW, rental for the master rm was 2,400 a month. There is something else I like to add. KP looked fantastic in part because I saw her only briefly n in part because she was beyond my reach. She may not look so attractive if I see her again. If a girl continues to work in the night scene, a part time mistress, you should offer only half the full time rates. This doesn't work for me as it's very difficult to monitor her activities. And don't ever buy such a part time mistress any gifts. For me, it's all or nothing. A girl is either exclusively mine or she is not mine. Doing ST is better than having a part time mistress. Cheers! Bro |
#4032
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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About the girl I pick up in PC. She did not ask for money but I give a token for her as form of transaction so I don't own her a favor. Recently, a young girl 18 yrs a week in SG wanted to me to BY her but not my cup of tea, she is 1.6M good looking nice tits and perfect silky skin. Very shrew but in experience with SG man. She claimed that her home is at Chao Tian Men District Beijing signalling that she is from a high end district but I told her I frequent CTM and I asked her to say I want to Fxxk you in Beijing accents and instead her Beijing accents become Hubei accents. She keep whispering to me to take her for one night but I decline unless she agree with my T&C I don't even take her number. Most girls don't speak the truth but some do. When a girl say that she just arrived in SG I will always asked to see her PP, if she show me at least she spoke 50% the truth and she give excuse I will play along. As you have mentioned a girl is exclusively mine or she is not.
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One is a secret Two is not. Giving points every time I login! http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=373233 |
#4033
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
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Tks so much for your detailed FR. You hv seen her nice tits, but you hv yet to make love to her? THE fastest way to make a girl yours exclusively is to make love to her ASAP, after qualifying and making sure that she is indeed good enough for you. If there is a faster way, let me know now. Cheers! Bro WB .......................................... Good morning! Here is an interesting article: Why do women cheat? Ashley Madison CEO tells all Is cheating bad? Why do women cheat? The founder and CEO of affair website Ashley Madison tells all, including why he has his eye on China. Read more: http://www.cnbc.com/id/102715169 Your comments? Cheers! Bro WB |
#4034
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
Good morning!
A famous Ang Moh relationship guru just sent me this e-mail. His methods work well w/ every healthy heterosexual female. QUESTION (from a reader) Just wanted to share a little bit of what your lessons have done for me. I read your book and started concentrating on what I thought was my weak points. I did as your book recommended and started picturing myself as the cocky funny person I wanted to be. I even did the whole daydream practice thing everyday. I work at a fitness center so I see lots of hot women all the time. My biggest weakness is that I look away quickly after eye contact is made. I decided that before I started trying to approach women I would make it my goal for a couple of weeks to just make eye contact and hold it until they looked away. Ok, here is the good part. After practicing eye contact for a couple of weeks and doing the whole mental exercise thing, I was at work one day working out after my break and was practicing my eye contact thing between sets with this really hot girl near the dumbbell rack. I knew she noticed but it never bothered me cause I had no intentions of acting. Well, I had to go over to get a set of dumbbells for my next exercise and as I got close to where she was, she suddenly turned around and said "I have a boyfriend" and turned around. Normally I would have just stood there in shock and said nothing but, I guess all that mental practice paid off. Without even thinking or pausing, the words just came out. I said "Hey that's great I am happy for you. (Pause - and in a lower tone) I know this is probably a major accomplishment for you but to the rest a the world this is kind of normal so you might not want to go telling every stranger you see." Then I just walked off with my weights to do my sets. 5 min later she comes over to me and apologizes and asks for my number. Turns out she didn't have a boyfriend but was just tired of being picked up by losers while she was trying to do a workout. Thanks for the pleasant surprise! XXY Ang Moh guru's cooments: Niiiiice one. Your letter is really a wonderful affirmation and summary of some of my favorite concepts: 1) Read my book, "Double Your Dating" 2) Actually use the material and mentally rehearse 3) Start from where you are 4) Be Cocky & Funny 5) Show complete indifference 6) Use illogical Jedi-Level mind power to create ATTRACTION. I'm going to talk more about eye contact and body language in a moment, but if you'd like to get the ultimate education on how to be Cocky & Funny, then you MUST take a minute and get this. OK...onward. First of all, your story would make NO sense at all to most guys. They would say, "Yeah, whatever. She was probably abused as a child and wants you to be her daddy" or "Well, if I worked at a gym, I could do that too." Of course, you realize that this had nothing to do with it...this was a result of you learning about how women are, then preparing, and then taking action. I couldn't be more impressed. Now, let's talk about some of the things that were happening that most people would MISS when reading the story... You mentioned your exercise of keeping eye contact until women look away. This is very powerful. I am guilty of not addressing this issue more often and I'm glad you mentioned it here. If you can learn this skill, it will communicate powerfully for you. Great job. You said, "I guess all that mental practice paid off. With out even thinking or pausing the words just came out." This is the result of preparation and mental rehearsal. This wasn't "luck". Even though the words were unique to the situation, the MESSAGE was delivered clearly. By learning how to better communicate in the language that women understand, you created magic. And, as for the words themselves... You just got to love saying: "Hey that's great. I am happy for you." (Pause - and in a lower tone) "I know this is probably a major accomplishment for you, but to the rest of the world, this is kind of normal. So, you might not want to go telling every stranger you see." to a hot woman at the gym! You INSTANTLY took a situation that would normally strip a man of all his composure and personal power, and then REFRAMED her words in a way that caused HER to look like the socially inept one. Then you did something equally powerful: YOU WALKED AWAY. In effect, you busted on her, then PROVED BEYOND THE SHADOW OF A DOUBT THAT YOU COULD TAKE HER OR LEAVE HER. Actions really do speak louder than words...most guys would have messed up that situation by standing around waiting for her to say something. You did the right thing by walking away. When you combine all of these factors together, you get a totally illogical outcome: ATTRACTION. She realized that you weren't just some other loser who hoped to maybe get a date by kissing up to her...You turned out to be one of the EXCEPTIONAL men in the world who have more personal power than her, and one of the even MORE exceptional men who also know how to create ATTRACTION. This combination made her feel a feeling that you can't create by DECIDING that you want it. It can only be created by TRIGGERING IT. Finally, I'd like to comment on the fact that SHE asked YOU for YOUR number. You realize that it's not typical for a woman to approach a man, apologize, and then ask for his number. Women will often ask a man for his number just to get rid of him. But not in a situation like this one. This was different. She apologized, then told you that she's tired of being picked up by losers...then asked for your number. This was, in effect, her telling you that she sees you DIFFERENTLY. All because of your eye contact, followed by a perfect execution of the Cocky and Funny attitude, followed by an excellent physical demonstration of indifference. Again, to most men this would make no sense at all. If you consulted most relationship books, they would argue that this type of approach would NEVER work. I mean, men are supposed to "court" women, compliment them...pursue them with gifts and favors, right? Yeah, right. The problem is that the mainstream relationship books forgot to TITLE the chapter that suggests this kind of behavior: "HOW TO BE THE WUSS WOMEN RUN FROM" ...or... "HOW TO CONVINCE THE WOMAN YOU DESIRE THAT YOU HAVE NO BACKBONE AND WOULD PAY ANY PRICE FOR HER ATTENTION" ...or... "SIMPLE TECHNIQUES FOR GIVING A WOMAN YOUR REPRODUCTIVE EQUIPMENT ON A PLATTER". The question I have for you is... CAN YOU PUT ASIDE YOUR PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS ABOUT WHY MEN AND WOMEN "SHOULD" BE ATTRACTED TO EACH OTHER LONG ENOUGH TO SEE WHY THEY ACTUALLY ARE ATTRACTED TO EACH OTHER? And, can you do what it takes to get yourself from where you are, to where you actually need to be, in order to attract the kinds of women that you would like to meet and date? It can be done, but you're going to have to do it. As I mentioned above, the first step is to read my online eBook, "Double Your Dating". That's the best head start I can give you. You'll be reading it within just a few minutes. And get yourself a copy of my fantastic program "Body Language For Success With Women And Dating". You will learn the "animal magnetism" secrets that guys who are "naturals" with women use to attract women using COMMUNICATION ALONE. No looks, money, or gifts required. I'll talk to you again soon. Your friend, Ang Moh Guru |
#4035
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Re: Picking up KTV gals ouside KTVs
Good morning!
Many bros/men are great w/ girls/women. Decades of experience n real life photos/videos to prove their greatness. Then there are the great ladies men of history. They are great w/ girls/women they like/love lightly. But all of them would change their behaviour when they meet THE ONE haha.They suddenly lose their emotional/sexual control and mastery. Same thing happens to the female gender. Let's not forget this. King Fuchai of Wu was a successful, masculine warrior who could have all the prettiest girls in present day Zhejiang n Jiangshu provinces. But when he met Xi Shi, he turned into a wussy good guy...and I'm sure she found him most unattractive. How can a man prevent getting bewitched by the most beautiful girl he has ever met? Because once he is bewitched, he becomes repulsive to her, regardless of his other excellent attributes. I like to share the following article sent by a guru. "The Big Mistake That Kills Attraction" You take your average good guy, good personality, lots of friends, generally cool, and then you put him in a situation with a woman that he's REALLY attracted to, and more often than not, he turns into a weirdo who acts creepy, needy, and generally nothing like his normal self. This sucks for him (he'll beat himself up for it afterwards), and it sucks for her (she missed out on getting to know a good guy that she might have had a sweet romance with). Nobody wins! So let's roll up our sleeves and talk about one quick fix. This topic is HUGE, I've talked about it plenty in my programs, but I want to make an important distinction that will help you get power over this built-in form of crazy. The issue: "Reaction monitoring" When a man feels strong attraction for a woman, his mind naturally begins to loop on whether she's attracted to him too. And then it usually starts to go nuts trying to figure out HOW to get her attracted, WHAT to say, and whether or not it's WORKING. That's reaction monitoring, and it's one of the most attraction-killing behaviors in the known Universe. I recently talked about this idea in a seminar and one of the guys asked me, "Don't have to watch her reactions to know where to steer the conversation and to know whether or not we're compatible or I'm wasting my time?" That does sound pretty darn logically, but the answer is absolutely NOT. I'll make a distinction between "reaction monitoring", being in "disregard", and being "in relation" to someone. Reaction monitoring is when your emotions are dependent on their reactions to what you are doing. If she laughs at your joke, you feel great, if she doesn't, you feel your ego drop out and feel like a loser. It's a dependency. And for a woman that dependency doesn't just feel WEAK and unattractive, it also feels like PRESSURE, because she begins to feel like she's on stage and that she must perform or the mood of the entire interaction will get weird. Her only recourse is to get the hell out. Disregard is like Aspergers (or more commonly, just some douche who is so impressed by his own lines that he doesn't notice when he is offending). This is paradoxically sometimes perceived by a woman as "strong and independent" and can get some attraction and action... but it can't lead anywhere. A man like that is not actually available for relationship, and he is generally acting out of a fear of his own inadequacy in intimacy. Women with higher self esteem (the good ones!), or simply more experience in dating will avoid men like that because they feel entitled to demand attention on their words, actions, and feelings. Instead, the goal is to be IN RELATION to her. This is a flow state where your emotions and her emotions create a cocktail of what IS. There's no effort to manipulate it, but simply to experience and enjoy it. When you are in RELATION to a woman (or to a man, for that matter), the quality of monitoring to see if you are being accepted or rejected disappears in the transparency of what is really happening in the moment. Cheers! Bro WB |
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