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#31
11-06-2012, 11:51 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
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#32
11-06-2012, 10:43 PM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
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#33
12-06-2012, 10:21 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
She says she wants to talk face to face...No more letters...I agree & we went to JB...The first thing M says to me when we sat down at Pizza Hut in JB was "Sorry"...She kept on saying how sorry she was for hurting me...Saying tt she still loves me...I just look at her & suddenly I scolded her..
I dont wat to hear those apologetic words...Told her I was deeply hurt & nothing could change tt...Her tears began to flow down her cheeks...I couldnt control myself...Words aft words kept coming out...All hurtful words..Then aft my emotions were controlled,I look at her & cried too.. I was soft hearted & then apologize for scolding her...A part of me was hoping we could reconcile but another was telling me to let go...She have already made up her mind to follow her ex back...After so long,I finally hear it from her mouth that she is going back to him.. In a way I was relieved that the whole love triangle saga is coming to an end..We could move on with our lives...I told her of my plans to go back to KL to work...Told her I'm going into accts line since I hv a diploma in it...All this while,wrkin as a waiter was only a stepping stone to finding a accts job in Spore but due to knowing M I didnt move on earlier as I hv hope... Then I took out a tissue & wipe away M's tears...She smiled...Tt was the first time M had smile infront of me since we parted..It was such a beautiful sight..She hold my hand as I was wiping her tears...Her touch was so warm & I felt like not wanting to let her go...I was fighting myself not to get too emotional... After a few hours,we were heading back to Spore... While on board 170,I reach out & hold M's hand just like I did when we both step out of the cinema 8 mths ago...She hold my hand tightly & put her head on my shoulder...I could hear M was cryin again but both of us just kept quiet the whole journey to Queen St.. I was hoping the bus trip would take an eternity so I could enjoy these last few moments with M...Soon enough we reached our destination...B4 we get down the bus,I told M I wont blame her for all the things tt hv happen..I hug her for the last time...She told me to take care of myself in KL & says "I will never forget you & I will always love you".... TBC....
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#34
12-06-2012, 11:24 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
Thanks bro TS for the story, really reminds me of my past relationship too, feels a bit bittersweet with hint of sour now....sigh love can be a bitch huh?
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#35
12-06-2012, 11:35 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
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#36
12-06-2012, 04:53 PM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
I feel more at peace now aft our rendevous in JB...I hv learn to let M go..Though we would meet occasionally during work,my hatred towards her had subsided..
One nite I saw M bought a piece of cake & she told me its for her bf...B4 this,I knw I would get angry abt this but now I hv to accept for who she is.. She's a caring & loving person...The piece of cake reminded me when M came over to my hostel upon hearing I had tooth ache & brought over green bean soup which she had made herself...She said it will help to ease the pain...Of coz I was jealous abt tt little piece of cake but what's the point in doing tt I told myself...Yes it was hard & I mean very very hard to take but I just walk away to compose myself... The day have finally come to leave the hotel...It was my last day...I was wrkin inside the coffee house & M was wrkin at the outdoor cafe...Many colleagues came by to wish me well but one particular aunty stood out...She ask me "You really giving up on M?...She still cares alot for you"...This aunty was the 1st person who knew we were dating 8 mths ago...How ironic tt she would be the last person in the hotel to ask me tt question.. I told her there's nothing more I can do...So she accepted my explanation...As the outdoor cafe is just beside the coffeehouse,I can see M at her wrkin place...I could see a few times she would turn to look at me...I just smile but deep inside my heart I was in pain...Then suddenly I could hear the band at the cafe saying they are going to sing a song for me as it was my last day...Initially I thght they actually knw it was my last day but later the singer says this song is a dedication fm yr love one,M...We both like this song when we were both wrkin together at the cafe...The song is "Daddy's Home"... I was stun by the attention...Then I saw M thru the glass window looking at me cryin...I could saw her lips was saying sting...She said "I love you"...I really wanted to run to her & hug her but I just couldnt do it...If I do,my feelings towards her would come flooding back...My last day wrkin & I thght I could let M go easily but how wrong am I...I just walk away once the song ends... Then it was time to go home aft wrk...We were waiting for our co transport...As both of us are staying far apart,we took different buses...When my bus came,I went over to M & told her this is it...I am leaving this place & told her to take care of yrself...As I'm not comfortable showing my emotions in public as there are alot of our colleagues there,I didnt hug M...I regretted not hugging her till today...M just stood there..I just hold her hand for awhile & boarded my bus.. TBC
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#37
13-06-2012, 12:43 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
bro TS, i feel for you bro. Thanks for sharing, cheers ..............
__________________
" Life is what happens when you're too busy making other plans." - John Lennon " All that is needed for Evil to succeed is, that decent human beings do NOTHING. " - Edmund Burke
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#38
13-06-2012, 09:27 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
Sorry to all coz my story lack sex coz this after all is adult discussion abt sex....Just want to pour out my feelings...
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#39
14-06-2012, 09:53 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
Finally the day to leave Spore has arrive...The last few nites was spend wz my ex colleagues & roomates...Drank beer with my roomates & my female colleagues brought me to Fire disco at Orchard Plz to forget the unhappiness of M...I appreciate their good intentions but I wasnt really enjoying myself for obvious reason...Though I did enjoy Douglas Olivero Energy's performance...
Went for dinner wz my roomates...We went back to our hostel as it was still early...I went downstairs to make one final call to M...She was wrking on tt day...I didnt actually told her it was my last day in Spore...I dont want to see her shedding more tears... She pick up the call...Told her goodbye & to take care of herself...All the while she was silent..Ask her why she is quiet...She just manage to say out "Please take good care of yrself ok"...The background was too noisy with the band playing...Couldnt really hear clearly... Then I said "You take care of yrself also ok & I will never ever 4get you"...She went silent again...I knew she was crying...Then i said goodbye & hung up the phone..I slowly walk back to my hostel wz a heavy heart...Last time didnt hv a handphone so I knew she couldnt call me back if she wanted to... My roomate brought me to Golden Mile to board my bus...Soon it was 9.30pm & its time for me to board the bus...Throughout the journey back I kept on thinkin of what might have been it I was a bit more aggressive in fighting over M...Could she hv choosen me over her ex??...Now its all too late...Though it hurts thinkin abt it but I know it was the right decision to make... Life continues in KL...Got an office job wrkin 9 to 6...Life was starting to be normal again...Met new colleagues although not as happening as b4 I must admit..Then I received a letter fm M...She said she is doing fine in Spore...Says since I went back,wrkin in the hotel just isnt the same anymore..She said whenever she walk past the coffeehouse she always imagine I was still there but was away for awhile in the kitchen coz she couldnt see me.. Whenever she thinks of me,she would read back all the letters i hv wrote to her b4..She would listen to the 2 cassette tapes I hv recorded for her...It contains all my fav songs..."Love Of A Lifetime"...""Lost In Love"..."Praying For Time"..."I've Been In Love Before"..."Save A Prayer"..."Look Away"...She says would cry listening to them when she was alone especially my fav song "Look Away"...Thinkin back dont knw if its fate but the lyrics of the song is abt a guy losing the girl he loves... TBC...
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#40
14-06-2012, 10:28 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
Oh...bro, reminds me of my first love too..
 Sweet n painful... Things that can never be forgotten thru time.
__________________
Support Wa Wa  Updated Support for Wawa!!! From RETIRED Chairman of Wawa Fans Club, supported by CEO of Crispy Fruity Pte Unlimited.
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#41
14-06-2012, 10:45 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
"It Must Have Been Love Love" - Roxette
that song gets me going every time ..so early 1990's i lost a love around that time, though not my first love ...still it was great lost to me ... though i did find new loves after that  ...first/early ones are of course very special cos so naive, so lost, don't know how to handle it well  ...thanks bro for the nostalgia ...
__________________
MEMENTO MORI - "remember that we are all going to die" come wit notin, leave wit notin. all we have r our experiences. make them da best. b true to yourself
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#42
14-06-2012, 11:20 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
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#43
14-06-2012, 11:54 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
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#44
14-06-2012, 12:01 PM
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#45
15-06-2012, 10:28 AM
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Re: My first love...21 years ago
Reading her letter saying how much she loves me makes me so guilty of not fighting over her...Her last words in the letter reads "I will always love you as a lover & a friend"...How I wish I could be there for her now...
I shed a tear after finishing the letter but life has to move on...We are living our separate lives now...Work in KL is great but it was not as fun as b4...I wrote to my ex colleagues in Spore & they told me M is doing fine although stimes she would be staring blankly into space...God only knws what is she thinkin...Mths went by & I soon manage to put M slowly behind me.. After abt a year,I was getting frustrated with work in KL...Then I saw an ad abt a job in Spore...I jump at the opportunity to work in Spore again...I stayed with my ex colleagues who hv rented a hse on their own...It was like old times...Only difference is tt I didnt look for M anymore...She knws I'm back thru my roomate but both of us didnt contact each other... Abt a year later,my roomate told me M is moving to Penang to work...He ask me if I want her new address there...I guess M must hv told him to pass it to me...I said "No"...Its better to let her go completely rather then hanging on...Time past by & eventually I met a girl in my new co...After 4 years of courtship,we are now happily married with 1 son... Stimes when I think back abt my time with M,it still bring back tears...But I want to remember M for the time we spend together as a couple..I would still think of M whenever I visit the places I went with her b4...Sentosa were we went cycling...Pasir Ris chalet where we acted like a married couple...The floating stadium where previously was a lovers make out place where we hug & kiss & of coz the hotel we previously worked...All these are special memories I will treasure for the rest of my life... The reason I started to write my story here is bcoz I heard my fav song "Look Away" on Class95fm & my mind was transported back to 1991...All the memories is still as fresh as it was back then...Till today I still think of M...Stimes I do want to see her again...Just want to see how she is doing...Tried to find her on Facebook by no such luck...Maybe we are not fated to be together... Whatever it is,M would always have a place in my heart...Nothing could take away our memories together..The only thing we share now is whenever we look up to the sky,we would be seeing the same clouds wherever she may be now... Just want to end my story by saying "I will always love you M". The End. Last edited by fictionman; 22-02-2013 at 11:35 PM.
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