My attempt at sharing my experiences...

[Rasta Marley]

Hi TS, just rewarded you with 7 points for your efforts in sharing. Cheers

[alphonsus]

TS, after reading this for so long, felt you have matured, 有情有义

[FirstTimeUser]

The way your life is panning out is great. Thanks for updating in such an interesting and captivating manner.

[EnigmaofSorrow]

I expected Shirley to get upset, start crying, or shout at me for even bringing up the idea. Strangely, she did not. Perhaps she was really enjoying the shoulder massage.

S: When?

Me: It's not confirmed yet. May not even happen.

S: I see.

Me: You sure you're ok with it?

S: I guess so. At least I'll have a companion in the house. And someone to gossip about you with.

Me: Ok. Now it's really sounding like a bad idea.

S: Am I supposed to charge her rent?

Me: Up to you. You did mention that you wanted to rent out a room.

S: But she's your friend.

Me: So?

S: And she isn't working. So it will be a little hard to pay rent right?

Me: She's temporarily unemployed.

S: Will you be moving back in as well?

Me: I'm still thinking about it.

S: Why?

Me: Don't feel comfortable.

S: Would you be more comfortable if she's here too?

Me: I don't know.

S: Ok. Then I'm agreeable for her to move in on a few conditions.

Me: Which are?

S: No smoking in the house, don't be too noisy, no funny guests. If she can contribute to the utilities and other expenses it would be good, if she can't then it's ok. Can she cook?

Me: I highly doubt it.

S: Hmm. Then maybe she has to help me buy food when I'm less mobile. And do the housework and stuff.

Me: Sounds like a maid.

S: I'm not done.

Me: I thought you said a few conditions?

S: Terms and conditions subject to change.

Me: Ok. Carry on.

S: I want you back here as well.

Me: That's not a condition for her.

S: I didn't specify that either.

Me: Fine.

S: She can take the spare room and I guess the study room can be converted back into a room for you. Or you can take the living room.

Me: Sounds reasonable.

S: And if you want to have sex with her, could you do it when I'm not around?

Me: We're not fuck buddies any more...

S: That's just in case either of you are tempted.

Me: Seriously we're just friends now.

S: Not intimate at all?

Me: Er well, sometimes we do hug.

S: And kiss?

Me: Not really...

S: So it might lead to sex?

Me: No.

S: You sure?

Me: Yes.

S: So how do you satisfy your urges?

Me: I don't.

S: Seriously?

Me: If I can't take it then I'll wank la...

S: Even if you have a willing girl to sleep with you?

Me: Yes.

S: Ok. You've really changed.

Me: I'm trying.

S: Do you think my breasts got bigger?

Me: Er. Aren't they supposed to? Some hormonal thing.

She cupped her breasts.

S: Doesn't feel any bigger.

I stopped massaging her.

Me: Are you trying to seduce me?

S: Maybe.

Me: Fucking a pregnant woman is not one of my fantasies.

S: I've been really really horny.

Me: Like I said many years before, you have fingers, use them.

S: Doesn't feel the same.

Me: Why are we even talking about this??

S: Kor, I know things have changed between us. But I really wish you never left.

Me: It's too late for regrets.

S: I know. But I really want things to go back to normal.

Me: That's not very possible.

S: I miss you touching me, caressing my body, licking me all over. Your hard-

Me: Stop it. It's the hormones speaking. You're gonna be a mother soon.

S: So I'll be a MILF.

Me: Very funny.

S: Do you think you'll ever sleep with me again?

Me: I can't answer that.

S: Am I no longer attractive to you?

Me: It's not about being attractive. Yes, you're still damn attractive. Your breasts are rounder and you look very womanly. If you weren't pregnant and things between us were still the same, I'd be fucking your brains out every day.

S: It's the baby right? It's because it's not yours. You think I'm a slut. And stupid for keeping the baby.

Me: No I don't. Like I said, things have changed. And I'm against abortion. We all make mistakes, some worse than others. If you decided to keep the baby I'll stand by you and support you, but as your brother. It's not that I don't want to sleep with you or I don't find you attractive anymore. But it would be against my principles. Besides, what if the father comes back and we were together? You would be making things very difficult for yourself, and the child.

S: He's not coming back. I won't let him. And you know something?

Me: What?

S: I've never heard you say things that make so much sense before. In a different situation I would be falling in love with you again.

Me: Abandon that thought please. Now I'm really just your brother.

S: I know. And I'm glad.

Me: Have you told your parents yet?

S: No. How do I tell them something like this?

Me: I don't know. But somehow someday you'll have to tell them.

S: I know.

Me: Are you feeling better now?

S: Yes. I'm glad we managed to somehow clear the air. And your massages are damn good. Will you massage me every day?

Me: Sure.

S: Thanks Kor. You're the best. I'm going to take a nap now.

Me: Ok. I'll go out and be back by dinner.

S: I'll let you know what I want.

Me: Sure.

S: So you'll move back in?

Me: Still thinking.

S: By the way, what's her name?

Me: Who?

S: Your ex fuck buddy.

Me: I wish you'd stop referring to her that way. Her names Jenny.

S: Ok. That's a nice name.

Me: Ok I'll be going now.

Shirley suddenly ran over and jumped onto me, squishing her soft, tender, growing breasts on me and hugged me tightly.

Me: Woah.

S: Thanks Kor.

I hugged her back.

Me: I'm only doing what I should have done.

Suddenly she grabbed my face and brought hers towards mine, lips parted, her warm, wet tongue slowly snaking into my mouth.

I tried my best to resist but she hung on to me like a leech. Truthfully, it was nice sharing a deep kiss with someone you like after so long.

Shirley dragged me back into the house and we collapsed onto the couch, our tongues still engaged in battle. I wondered if the baby was all right.

Instinctively, my hands went straight for her breasts, feeling the glorious fullness her pregnancy brought about. She unzipped my berms and stuck her hand in.

What the fuck were we doing?

[esoterics1984]

i may be ur cousin, but i think u deserve a gd fuck. She's pregnant for gods sake. Wat the fuck were u thinking? I'm assuming u haven't replied to any of my sms becos of all this probs, but seriously wat the fuck. We need to talk.

[SharkAttack]

yesh, ts is a MAN now.

Yeah btw, most lady friends of mine still have good sex lives even when they're preg. Its not harmful in anyway. Just dont do those super rough wwe royal rumble type of activities.

[magicbrush]

Originally Posted by esoterics1984

i may be ur cousin, but i think u deserve a gd fuck. She's pregnant for gods sake. Wat the fuck were u thinking? I'm assuming u haven't replied to any of my sms becos of all this probs, but seriously wat the fuck. We need to talk.

oops cousin is here.

excellent story bro enigma.
i hope you'll see good out of this ordeal soon.

[EnigmaofSorrow]

Originally Posted by magicbrush

oops cousin is here.

excellent story bro enigma.
i hope you'll see good out of this ordeal soon.

Thanks for the concern. And to my cousin, don't you think the reason why i never replied to your msgs is because i don't want to trouble anyone? Did you even check with my brothers or sister if i contacted them? The answer is no. This is my problem to handle. And stop jumping to conclusions about my character and what not. Just because i stopped writing halfway doesn't mean anything bad happened. Don't assume. So yeah. Fuck you too.

[EnigmaofSorrow]

to all my readers: sorry for the outburst. Just a little pissed off with my cousin. Next update will be up soon.

[esoterics1984]

Originally Posted by EnigmaofSorrow

to all my readers: sorry for the outburst. Just a little pissed off with my cousin. Next update will be up soon.

Chill out. Didnt mean it dat way. At least reply to ur sms so we noe u r alive.

[FirstTimeUser]

Originally Posted by EnigmaofSorrow

to all my readers: sorry for the outburst. Just a little pissed off with my cousin. Next update will be up soon.

No problem. Do continue updating. Cheers!

[EnigmaofSorrow]

By now I was already rock-hard, having not released for a substantial period.

The feelings of intimacy filled both my heads as our tongues swirled around each other, tasting each other. I caressed her breasts and occasionally brushed against her nipples which were by now engorged to a much larger size than before. Her hands reached into my briefs and withdrew the throbbing monster. She encircled it and wanked me slowly, purposefully using my foreskin to stimulate the glans. Drops of pre-cum oozed out and were instantly used as lubricant.

I moved my hands downwards, caressing the slight bump on her tummy, feeling her nicely rounded hips.

Then I stopped.

Me: Fuck.

I grabbed her hand off my cock and zipped up my berms, not caring that my raging hard-on was begging for a release.

Me: I'm sorry. I can't do this. We shouldn't be doing this.

Shirley looked at me and began to tear.

S: Kor, I want you so bad.

Me: No. It isn't right. I really can't.

I grabbed my stuff and headed for the door.

Me: I'm really really sorry. I have to go now. I'll be back for dinner.

S: Kor! Please!

I shut the door and practically ran off. The lift was nowhere in sight so I ran down the stairs.

Once I reached the ground floor, I took out my cigarettes and lit one, while walking briskly to my car.

Upon reaching, I stubbed out the cigarette and started the engine. I took out my phone and typed a text message.

Me: I'm coming over. I really need you now.

Without waiting for a reply I sped off, reaching Jenny's house in less than 20 minutes. She was waiting for me at the lift lobby.

J: What's wrong?

Me: Can we go up?

J: No. Parents there. I don't wanna be there.

Me: Jason?

J: He just grabbed more of his stuff and left. What's happening?

I grabbed her hand.

Me: Roof garden.

We headed to the roof garden and found a secluded spot. I lay on the bench on Jenny's lap. She stroked my hair.

J: What's wrong?

Me: I almost did something I know I will regret.

J: What?

Me: I almost fucked her.

J: Who? Shirley? Literally or verbally?

Me: Sexually.

J: Huh? Why?

Me: I don't know what came over me.

J: You still love her la.

Me: It's not that.

J: Don't bluff. You wanted to fuck her. Her breasts must be damn nice now...

Me: That's not the point.

J: Then?

Me: I stopped before it went further.

J: How far?

Me: We were kissing and I was playing with her breasts and she was wanking me.

J: And then you stopped but you are still horny so you came to find me?

Me: Yeah.

J: You wanna fuck issit?

Me: No la! I just needed to be with you.

J: Why? I bet she's so much hotter than me now. And very horny as well.

I sat up.

Me: I'm trying to be serious here.

J: So am I. I know you're trying to change, but give up sex with a hot girl? I doubt you can.

Me: I haven't slept with you in a while right?

J: True. And why?

Me: I don't know.

J: I mean we aren't really fuck buddies any more, but I'll never turn you down.

Me: Jenny, please. I need some non-sexual companionship now.

J: Ok.

I hugged her tightly.

Me: I really don't know how I let it happen.

J: Obviously you're horny. How long has it been?

Me: What?

J: When you last had sex.

Me: A very long time?

J: Wanked?

Me: Since the last time I had sex la.

J: So you're absolutely bursting.

Me: Probably.

J: So fuck her then. She wanted it right?

Me: I think so. But I can't. It's not right.

J: So once again you end up here. And then you're telling me you don't want to have sex with me either?

Me: Yes.

J: Weirdo.

I hugged her even tighter.

J: So if I started kissing you now and playing with your cock, you wouldn't want to have sex with me?

Me: Ordinarily I would. But no.

J: Ok. Then what do you want?

Me: I just want to hold you in my arms.

J: That's sweet, but you do realise I feel like a substitute?

Me: I'm sorry.

J: So do you want to release or not?

Me: Nope. I'm fine. I'm very contented just holding you.

J: Super weirdo.

But she snuggled up to me anyway.

We cuddled in silence for a while longer.

J: I'm guessing Jason told you what's been happening?

Me: Yeah.

J: And that dickhead suggested you take care of me?

Me: Well yes.

J: Crazy.

Me: I also asked Shirley if you could move in if you needed to.

Jenny broke off from our embrace.

J: You what?!

Me: I just told you.

J: You're crazy. I'm the cause of your breakup. If it can even be considered a breakup. And you want me to move in with her? I might get killed while I'm asleep.

Me: She's cool with it.

J: I'd rather die on the streets.

Me: Really. She's fine with it. But I practically ran away just now, so I don't know if anything has changed.

J: I won't move in.

Me: Please? At least I can keep an eye on both of you.

J: You're moving in too?

Me: I guess so.

J: Move in then. I'll stay here.

Me: If the house gets sold?

J: I'll survive. Somehow.

Me: Really. Just come with me and have a chat with her. Then we'll see how things go.

J: You're nuts. I don't have a death wish.

Me: Nothing will happen. I'll be there. I'll protect you.

J: Ah ha! Why do I need protection if nothing is gonna happen?

Me: Figure of speech. Do you wanna come or not?

J: Just to see if we can be suitable housemates? With the guy with both used to sleep with hanging around?

Me: What's wrong with that?

J: Well either we do get along and one fine day we'll somehow have a threesome and then we'll all regret it, or she's setting this up to take revenge on me, or you.

Me: I don't think she's capable of that.

J: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Ever heard of that?

Me: Yes. But I'm giving you a convenient option. You wanna stay here and be miserable? Jason's already moving out.

J: He's just trying to prove a point.

Me: And?

J: I'm not like him.

Me: Are you happy living here now?

J: Not anymore. But what can I do?

Me: Move in with me.

J: Crazy.

Me: Trust me.

J: I don't want to be a light bulb.

Me: For?

J: You two.

Me: We aren't exactly getting back together.

J: You almost had sex today.

Me: Almost. I came to my senses.

J: I'm still now convinced.

Me: How do you know she won't be the light bulb?

J: You and me? That's even worse. I'd rather we rent a room somewhere else if we really were together. And that's 6 years time. If we're still single.

I remembered the pact.

Me: Well, I'm not sure I should move back alone.

J: Oh I get it.

Me: What?

J: You're afraid you'll give in to temptation. So you came to me hoping to get your release so you won't be horny when you go back there.

Me: Do you really think so lowly of me?

J: Nope. But it sounds logical right?

Me: Somewhat.

J: What are you afraid of?

Me: I don't know.

J: Then go live with her, take care of her. She needs you more now. I can take care of myself. Besides, I might not be able to afford the rent even if I moved there.

Me: Who said anything about rent?

J: Ok, now you're really being absurd. You expect me to go and live with you and you ex for free?

Me: I'll work things out.

J: Well my answer is still no.

Me: Do consider it.

J: Right.

Me: Do you want to go somewhere else now?

J: What ever for? You really want sex right?

Me: No! Argh. Never mind. I'll just head back there.

J: Yeah. You should. This conversation is getting nowhere.

Me: You'll be fine right?

J: Do I look like a little kid to you?

Me: No.

J: Then please go and fulfill your duties.

Me: Ok. I'll catch up with you soon?

J: No need. Spend your time with her. I'll let you know if I need anything.

Me: Ok. Take care then.

J: Look, I appreciate your efforts, but you need to prioritize. I'll see you when I see you.

Me: Ok.

We shared one last hug and I left.

[anton]

Originally Posted by EnigmaofSorrow

Me: No I don't. Like I said, things have changed. And I'm against abortion. We all make mistakes, some worse than others. If you decided to keep the baby I'll stand by you and support you, but as your brother. It's not that I don't want to sleep with you or I don't find you attractive anymore. But it would be against my principles. Besides, what if the father comes back and we were together? You would be making things very difficult for yourself, and the child.

Reading your story, you are like a man of few words.
So this has got to be the longest piece in any of your conversations.

[blade]

bro you are back.

I believe i have been reading your story since the begining. great writing. glad that you are back thou seems like more things happened. hope you manage to get everything solved out.

[EnigmaofSorrow]

It was not yet dinner time so I drove around aimlessly, thinking about whether I should return to Shirley's house.

Was it really such a big deal if I had sex with her even if she was pregnant with another man's child?

I still could not convince myself that it was alright. In any case, I doubt I would be having sex with her if she was pregnant with my child anyway. No doubt scientific research has proven that it is safe to have sex during pregnancy, the thought of it just put me off. Imagine you are peacefully sleeping in your nice warm bed and suddenly you get unwanted visitors. Millions of them. Furthermore, what if she got pregnant while pregnant? I recall reading somewhere that it was possible, though highly unlikely.

I eventually reached east coast and parked the car before heading to my favorite spot, the breakwater. I checked the time, it was only 4pm.

I kinda of regretted not being able to spend more time with Jenny, especially after finding out about her family problems. But in a sense she was right. Shirley did need me more right now. But truthfully I was afraid. Afraid of going back and losing control. Afraid of doing more things that I would regret for a long time. And if I gave in to her sexual needs, she would get the wrong idea and assume that we were alright. Thought it was my fault that she is in this state, I did not feel that I should be making any attempt to reconcile. Things have changed. Maybe I have changed.

I continued staring into the open sea, watching the dark clouds form. It seemed like a storm was coming. Or maybe it was getting late. The weather had been unpredictable lately. Scorching heat in the morning and early afternoon, followed by vicious thunderstorms later on.

A text message came in. It was Diane.

D: Where u?

I wondered if I should reply. Diane was starting to became a pain. How did she get involved in this anyway?

The more I thought about it, the more I felt that it was a trap set by both of them as revenge for breaking their hearts. But maybe I was paranoid.

I did not reply in the end.

It was nearing 5pm when suddenly someone sat down next to me. I turned to look. It was Diane.

Me: How did you find me?

D: Not a lot of place you would go. You told me before.

Me: I did? Shit.

D: She told me what happened.

Me: What?

D: That you two almost lost control.

Me: I didn't mean to.

D: Why can't you just give in?

Me: What?

D: I thought before me you were all about the sex? Not rejecting it when it came?

Me: It's different now.

D: Because she's preggers?

Me: Yeah.

D: So? Pregnant women can have sex. They're like any other women, but you just need to be a little more careful, and only do it in certain positions.

Me: It's not that.

D: Then what?

Me: I just can't bring myself to do it.

D: You turned gay or something? Sex is sex. Of course it's a bonus if you love the person.

I kept quiet.

D: Well?

Me: Well what?

D: Do you love her?

Me: I can't answer that.

D: Why not?

Me: Things have changed. Stop probing.

D: Did you love me?

Me: I can't answer that either.

D: Why not?

Me: It was too early to tell if it was love or not.

D: Can't we be honest with each other?

Me: I'm being honest.

D: I did not love you. I liked you a lot. And was really looking forward to developing the relationship...

Me: But?

D: You gave it all up. All because of a stupid argument about your family. Do you even care about them?

Me: Not really?

D: Why not?

Me: Where were they when I needed someone? All my dad wanted was money. I'm ok with my stepmom, but if I don't contact her she doesn't contact me. My stepbrothers are old enough to take care of themselves, one of them is probably having a better career in the army than me. My sister is already married. She has not contacted me either, so I don't bother her.

D: What about your natural mother.

Me: I don't want to talk about her.

I turned away from Diane, not wanting her to see that I was about to cry.

She moved closer and hugged me. I felt her huge boobs pressing against my shoulders.

D: What's wrong.

Me: Nothing.

D: Tell me.

Me: I hate her ok? She never fought for custody. She just left us with the bastard. It's like she never cared. I don't even remember how she looks like.

She hugged me tighter.

D: And you couldn't tell me all this before?

Me: Not many people know how I really feel. Not my stepbrothers, my sister, cousins, friends. Not even Jason. He knew something was wrong but was smart enough not to ask.

D: Then why open up to me?

Me: I don't know.

D: If you told me all this before, we probably would still be together.

Me: It's too late now ain't it?

D: I still think you're a nice guy. But I would rather see Shirley happy with you around.

Me: What makes you think I'm happy?

D: If you weren't, why come back? Why take care of her? Why did you even kiss her back?

Me: I don't know.

D: There's a lot of things you don't know. I think either a part of you wants to be back with her, but you are supressing it. Either that or you are fucking horny. So much so that you almost took advantage of a horny pregnant girl. So which is it?

Me: How would I know?

D: Fine. Only you know yourself. I won't even try to pretend to know what's going on in that head of yours.

Me: I didn't ask you to be my shrink.

D: Whatever. Anyway I'm going back there. She wants KFC for dinner. You coming?

Me: Let me stay here awhile ok? You know this is how I destress and clear my thoughts.

D: Fine. I'll grab your share. What do you want?

Me: Any deals?

D: There's the new burger that's on promotion cos of the avengers movie.

Me: There is?

D: I'm guessing you didn't even know avengers is launching tomorrow.

Me: Hmm.

D: Do you even know who the avengers are?

Me: Ya la. Iron man, captain America all that right?

D: Oh so you do know something.

Me: Funny. So what's that new burger?

D: Zinger double down. 2 patties with cheese mayo and turkey bacon in between.

Me: Sounds like a McSpicy Double.

D: No bread.

Me: Huh?

D: The zinger patty is the bread.

Me: That sounds very unhealthy.

D: So what do you want?

Me: Double down lor.

D: I thought you said it's unhealthy.

Me: I didn't say I didn't wanna try it.

D: Fine. Anything else?

Me: Er. Cheese fries? Chicken?

D: You want more chicken?

Me: Why not?

D: Ok. I'll get a family feast or something. With your double down. Can you finish it all?

Me: Pregnant lady with cravings can finish it. Otherwise there's the fridge and microwave.

D: Crispy or original?

Me: Mixed?

D: Ok. I'll go to the Kallang drive through.

Me: There's a KFC at central.

D: I know. I just prefer the drive through.

Me: Ok.

D: I'll see you back at her house. If you ain't back by 7 I'll bring her here.

Me: Are you nuts?

D: No. Just ensure you are back.

Me: Fine.

Diane got up to leave, brushing the sand off her shorts.

D: Be there.

Me: Bye.

She left and I resumed my staring competition with the open sea.