mistress wants to bear baby

[HappyBuddy]

Originally Posted by porscheclub

KNN, bro korean. I cannot tahan you but felt compelled to write again.

File for Separation. You need lawyer's no?

Just pack up & move out. Go to parent's place or rent a room out there. 4 years later automatically chop & split. No quarrel, no counselling, full stop. The lawyer will start the clock the moment you move out & serve her the paper.

You're just running away from your troubles by doing the disappearing act & it'll haunt you wherever you go because the problem actually lies in you! Go think about it.

I saw a picture today of an old couple hugging together after 65 years. People asked them how they did it & the wife said, "We're born in an age where we fix things and not throw them away"

hmm..... sounds right

[Rickcola]

oh boy! what a mess!

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

Indeed you are in a square now, all sides are the same no matter which direction you go.

Wait long long still have to wait. There is nothing you can do other than you feel that you are suffering.

Take good care of yourself, tomorrow will be better.

Yes I'm actually playing the waiting game for more than 10 years, and will continue until there is a promising solution. At the same time I'm starting to prepare an emergency exit plan as I dunno when will I be triggered to push the button.

We just had a quarrel again this week. As usual back to square one again

[Johnbass]

Originally Posted by korean

I used to step out of the house, and before I really went off, she was trying to suicide to threaten me.

There was once I ignored her threathen, n she called up my family n as my parent are soft kind of person, I lose the battle.

If I take ur advice, probably suicide incident may appear in newspaper. I'm not as cruel to see ppl die in front of me yet. If yes I will follow ur advice.

If I disappear, probably she got higher chance to stay alive as without seeing me live or dead. I dunno, that y need u guys opinions.

Didn't follow your story...
But sounds like the recent murder case...
Mai lah...

Go seek professional help....

[korean]

Originally Posted by Johnbass

Didn't follow your story...
But sounds like the recent murder case...
Mai lah...

Go seek professional help....

lol, if it happens to me it will be i got killed by her first

i guess professional help will need both parties to go there, which I dont think will work for my case. and I have doubt on their capability too. but if anyone got more info i can look into this option for backup plan

[porscheclub]

Originally Posted by korean

I used to step out of the house, and before I really went off, she was trying to suicide to threaten me.

There was once I ignored her threathen, n she called up my family n as my parent are soft kind of person, I lose the battle.

If I take ur advice, probably suicide incident may appear in newspaper. I'm not as cruel to see ppl die in front of me yet. If yes I will follow ur advice.

If I disappear, probably she got higher chance to stay alive as without seeing me live or dead. I dunno, that y need u guys opinions.

People who will commit suicide won't tell you. Sorry to say this but you are clearly under her control for too long.

You're too soft & only you can redeem yourself. Looks like your only chance of happiness is to outlive her!

[Edyta]

Originally Posted by korean

lol, if it happens to me it will be i got killed by her first

i guess professional help will need both parties to go there, which I dont think will work for my case. and I have doubt on their capability too. but if anyone got more info i can look into this option for backup plan

not necessary. u can go yourself then they can advice u how to engage the other party. try family service centres or feiyue. they will only chargr u according to your financial ability so dont worry if it would be an expensive option.

[korean]

Originally Posted by Edyta

not necessary. u can go yourself then they can advice u how to engage the other party. try family service centres or feiyue. they will only chargr u according to your financial ability so dont worry if it would be an expensive option.

Thx for ur advice. My only concern is they r not so professional n later say without engaging the other party, they cannot help much. Just like many professional they r actually not very professional but just earn for a living. If u know what I mean.

[korean]

Originally Posted by porscheclub

People who will commit suicide won't tell you. Sorry to say this but you are clearly under her control for too long.

You're too soft & only you can redeem yourself. Looks like your only chance of happiness is to outlive her!

I know what u mean, but I dare not take the risk now, and if that already happened u won't see me post here. Yes im under her control for too long n i may take the step as mentioned. If that really happen n im still alive n know the outcome (hopefully not if it is a bad one), ill let u guys know.

[city slicker]

Originally Posted by porscheclub

People who will commit suicide won't tell you.

TS, you are a victim of emotional blackmail.
Suggest you see a psychiatrist who can help u cope with your unhappy situation.

[korean]

Originally Posted by city slicker

TS, you are a victim of emotional blackmail.
Suggest you see a psychiatrist who can help u cope with your unhappy situation.

Thx for ur suggestion bro, but this has nothing to do with mental issue but fake marriage. One person wanna go n another person doesn't wanna let go that's it.

[a2014]

Originally Posted by korean

I dare not take the risk now, and if that already happened u won't see me post here. Yes im under her control for too long

In the first case why get married. I belief that you are already unhappy before you married in this situation. Married is a responsibility as well which both party need to fulfill regardless of what happened next.

[korean]

Originally Posted by a2014

In the first case why get married. I belief that you are already unhappy before you married in this situation. Married is a responsibility as well which both party need to fulfill regardless of what happened next.

good question. yes u r rite I was already unhappy before married. We had been together for few years before married and we quarreled very often which affected my daily life including my work. I tried to end the relationship many time but as I'd mentioned it failed as ultimately she will threaten me with suicide. Things did not improve (cant recall was it getting worst) over years until a point that her parents talked to me regarding ROM and getting a house. As I was a passive person that time, and also hope for the best that probably after marriage her thinking may change and find both of us were not suitable (never try never know mindset for her). Unfortunately after more than 10 years of marriage, divorce never come across her mind eventhough I proposed many time to her when we quarreled madly. The good thing after married is the frequent of quarrels has been cut down tremendously as she felt more secure (woman mindset) and I have more peaceful days as compared to the past.

Anyway time cannot turn backward. I'm suffering due to whatever I did wrongly previously or karma from past life. I accept my fate but it does't stop me from considering other options, especially now I'm not alone anymore.

[city slicker]

Originally Posted by korean

Thx for ur suggestion bro, but this has nothing to do with mental issue but fake marriage. One person wanna go n another person doesn't wanna let go that's it.

Its sheer distress to cope with a spouse who plays the suicide card.
The fact is many people do suffer from mental disorders e.g. bipolar.
Does the attached article rings a bell?
Hope it helps TS.

http://outofthefog.net/CommonBehavio...Blackmail.html

[old_yet_horny]

The whole saga really sounds familiar with my very own encounter... Had a lover in China and a wife in S'pore. Lover was with me for 3 years until i get my posting back to Singapore.

Seperated with my lover in China but I was lucky as i played the cards right in the very begining. I told her I am on expat package and contract is 3 years and depending on performance, extention is not promised. So company posted me back to s'pore after my contract and I bid her a gentlemen farewell. Took her few weeks to stop crying over our relationship...

Towards the end of my 3 years relationship with the lover, she wanted to bear my baby and even said the same thing like ..no need to bear any responsibilities over the child etc etc... Even though she is the making of a good mother (as I seen how she took care of her nephews and nieces) I am compelled to not a;llowing pregnancy to happen as I am not god and I cant predict the future, what will happen to her and the child if I am not around to support.

So summary is that... Just too bad, we met the right people but at the wrong timing. For now...as and when I go China for short visits, I will still meet her up for dinner and passionate sex if i happens to be near her.

Bro Korean... My opinion is that go with your feelings... and most importantly, no human lives should be involved i.e abortion, suicide etc etc.. Karma is double in your next life if these kind of stuffs happens.

If you have no children with your current wife and no more love in her.. move on. Both of you will be better without each other and if she dun commit suicide, or go mental, she will get over it in time, maybe years.. believe me.

As for your lover, i suggest you hold your horse until your current marriage is settled or over.. Reason being that you may just bump into someone who is really the right one for you later on in life.