Could you do without sex in marriage?

snuggles · #1 19-05-2011, 11:07 AM

Perhaps one for fellow female samsters here.

Being male, I wanted to know... if life was busy with kids, work, etc... would sex be just dropped on the wayside? Would this be okay with you (male or female)?

I ask this only because I will follow up with the inevitable "what next" question and for some of your advice.

By the way, my view is that I got married so that I could have more sex (safe sex) with someone whom I love and definitely did not do so to end up being a monk. Monks don't get to have sex, right? Or maybe they do, but secretly.

Thanks.

Faidenk · #2 19-05-2011, 07:54 PM

Simply explained, men give love to have sex and women give sex to have love.

Reoxy · #3 19-05-2011, 09:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Faidenk

Simply explained, men give love to have sex and women give sex to have love.

Well said.

Interestingly, the same formula also works when Love is substituted by Money.

snuggles · #4 20-05-2011, 01:48 PM

So if she's got my love, then where's my sex?

Perhaps I should just ask who's not had sex with their wife for XX months? years?

abchow · #5 20-05-2011, 01:51 PM

HI TS ,

Sex and love goes hand in hand in a happy Marriage.

If there is love but no sex , then something is amiss.
If both man and woman is healthy and normal , there should be a healthy appetite for this.
But if kids and work come in between this, then both must try to work out time for each other. Or else the marriage become a piece of contract.

Sooner or later , they will have problems in the marriage.

Try to make time for each other and not take each other for granted.
Man or woman .. !!

good luck.
Cheers!!

jasdude · #6 22-05-2011, 01:44 PM

Seek professional help . Both you guys should sit down and talk first about the issue and go for Sex and Marriage counseling .

joew2005 · #7 22-05-2011, 02:41 PM

Marriage is a social union or legal contract betw ppl tat creates kinship.
It is an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate & sexual, r acknowledged in a variety of ways, depending on the culture or subculture in which it is found. Such a union, often formalized via a wedding ceremony, may also be called matrimony.

People marry 4 many reasons, including 1 or more of the following: legal, social, libido, emotional, economical, spiritual & religious.
These might include arranged marriages, family obligations, the legal establishment of a nuclear family unit, the legal protection of children & public declaration of commitment. The act of marriage usually creates normative or legal obligations betw the individuals involved.
In some societies these obligations also extend 2 certain family members of the married persons. Some cultures allow the dissolution of marriage thru divorce or annulment.

Marriage is usually recognized by the state, a religious authority or both. It is often viewed as a contract. Civil marriage is the legal concept of marriage as a governmental institution irrespective of religious affiliation, in accordance with marriage laws of the jurisdiction.

2 read more on marriage, pls continue @
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marriag...s_of_marriages

orneryjoe · #8 27-05-2011, 06:46 AM

Marriage is a failed social institution in most developed societies.

Divorce rates are high and even when couples do not divorce, there is plenty of unhappiness in many marriages. Extra-marital affairs are fairly common as are instances of serial monogamy. Indulgence in porn is widespread. Visiting sex workers or finding fbs is for those who feel that fantasy is insufficient.

How has marriage failed humans? By insisting that we should be restricted to one, and only, one partner. It goes against our natural inclinations.

Nature can be repressed, but the costs for doing so is tension that often manifests itself in some of the ways listed above.

Where did we go wrong? A long, long time ago, unfortunately, when we discovered agriculture and began to adopt a sense of ownership towards land and gradually... everything else, including sex partners. Religion sealed our fate further when the number of partners was restricted to one.

Is there a way out of this morass? Yes, but it is not an easy one. For the uncommitted, just do not get married. For those already married, the pill is more bitter. Ideally, couples should come to a new understanding and adopt an alternative non-monogamous lifestyle. Doing that in an honest, open fashion is far from easy.

burningicez · #9 28-05-2011, 12:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by snuggles

Perhaps one for fellow female samsters here.

Being male, I wanted to know... if life was busy with kids, work, etc... would sex be just dropped on the wayside? Would this be okay with you (male or female)?

I ask this only because I will follow up with the inevitable "what next" question and for some of your advice.

By the way, my view is that I got married so that I could have more sex (safe sex) with someone whom I love and definitely did not do so to end up being a monk. Monks don't get to have sex, right? Or maybe they do, but secretly.

Thanks.

Y get married in exchange for sex in the 1st place?

arsenal_84 · #10 29-05-2011, 09:11 AM

please have an open discussion with your wife first.

RealEstateGuy · #11 29-05-2011, 10:15 AM

Absolutely not. If can't do without it as a bachelor why would that need change? I mean the frequency might change from every other day to every few days but if you are talking about once a month then it would be extremely hard.