Ruler Loong exhorts lackeys to sapork him since Old Autocrat visiting Lord Yama soon

[Sammyboy RSS Feed]

An honorable member of the Coffee Shop Has Just Posted the Following:

Transmodified from hxxp://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/pap-must-continue-to/914358.html

PEASANTPORE: Peasantpore's ruling Familee Action Party (PAP) says it must continue to rule over clueless serfs and peasants and provide take Familee forward despite eventual demise of Old Autocrat LKY.

And His regime has adopted a new eight-point resolution to build a better Peasantpore for Familee and rich merchants only with peasants fighting for the leftovers.

Addressing the PAP Feel Good Talk Fest on Sunday morning, Ruler Loong, favoured son of Old Autocrat LKY, who coincidentally ruling party's secretary-general, said there is a difference in being a ruler or leader.

Ruler Loong reminded activists aka 'Paul Lampards' at the Talk Fest that the regime plays a special role by extracting economic rent from merchants who prey on cheap local peasants, hence any policies must address this special rent extraction mechanism. Hence what is good for the regime is not necessary good for peasants and vice versa. In any case, Familee's interests are paramount.

"Lumpar, that Teochew Kiang say he want to slap me if I drive off course, who he think he is? This is a fucking Asiatic autocracy, he say, he slap, he can slap meh? If I want to zap him tonight, you think he can live and see the morning sun tomorrow?" said Ruler Loong.

Topping the list of things-to-do is strengthening the Peasantpore loyalty despite the advent of Jane Austen ideas.

Ruler Loong said: "Many peasants tulan with my 3.1 million peanuts pay, but c'mon lah, I got work harder than Najib or King Rama IX hor. They earn more than me and got less Jane Austen inspired netizens to worry about.

Anytime Najib tulan with anyone, he simply dynamite them. King Rama IX anytime want to change PM, he ask the army to organize a coup, in the past, my Ah Pa got ISA to hammer anyone he not happy with, now you think I 'suka suka' can use ISA and pulverize anyone meh? I also must subtly do so lor, not like last time, anyhow wantonly use ISA or '莫许有'.


"Now you see the Bapoks, X;tians and Moslem collectively give me more headaches, fucking hell, I should not have weaken the pagans if I knew this will cum. All these groups now got this Jane Austen Disease, all clamouring for more rights to pissed each another, can meh? They fucking forget that Familee should be the center of their universe, not their rights or their petty deities."

Ruler Loong noted with the pagans seriously weakened, many pretenders have emerged from the abyss to continuously seeks to have more of its requirements institutionalised and to stretch the limits a bit further.

The Chinks wanting more schools preaching Zhou Dynasty Confucian ethics, Moslems want to implement Hudud laws, stone adulteress or chop off thieves' hands. Nehs are fighting to give status to Tamil vs Hindi, they really fucking believe Familee not omnipotent liao?!

Ruler Loong said: "They better remember it Ruler Loong who dispense favours and graces to them, not their Kong Zi or other petty Middle-eastern deities. Make me tulan, you see what happen lor, trust me, dun try it.

"But to show the Ang Mohs that we are nominally a democracy, I must wayang a bit, need to compromise, give and take. Jane Austen ideas are good but in statecraft, can work meh? You think lor.'

"Imagine you run a KTV whoreshop, if you want to implement Jane Austen ideas, then all the fucking Mamasan will climb over your head and their KTV hostess might as well be the OKT themselves, then the existing OKT do what?"

"Each community will look at what the other is getting (and says) 'he got more, I would like some too. How come he can have, I cannot have'. C'mon lah, got balls, come and compare with Familee lor, my Mama Gecko equally good in investing like Warren Buffet, got guts, come and compare with her lor, if not, then shut up and go count the coconuts in your Kampung ok.

"I agree, we not in Moslem paradise, no virgins racing to fuck you but compare to Laos or Cambodia where they sell their daughters to be whores for PRC bastards or maids for Peasantpore, ask yourselves? If Old Autocrat never exploit your grandparents to be serfs for MNCs, you all think you can debate with Bapoks or try to ask for Hudud Laws? C'mon lah, think think think."

Ruler Loong said: "Inequality, like greed is good."

"You see Maoist pigs try to aim for Equality, yeah, every PRC peasant was equally poor while Mao lived and ravished virgins like a Chink Despot. I know recently got Netizens says we favour some primary schools because their parents got connections. C'mon, you go Nihon, go Finland or Nordic states, you can be sure those paediphiles very fucking clean and never reserve the best for their Rulers' princelings meh?

Maximise equality of opportunity - you think dun need money is it? Plus peasants are ungrateful, they toss Chiam aside when he is old and deemed useless, so why should I spend money on ungrateful Asiatic peasants? You think equality grows on trees?"

Using Quantum Mechanics Uncertainity Principle, Ruler Loong states fair and just society cannot co-exist. You have more of one and less of the other, as the Ruler, he gets to choose.

One group which will receive dedicated focus is the elderly.

A new PAP Seniors Group, headed by Lame Speaker of Imperial Court 'Halimah' - No Fish Eat Chicken, has been set up to reduce spending on ageing issues but to be seen doing something to placate Asiatic moralists.

Ruler Loong also spoke about the challenges facing the PAP regime in a new era.

He said that the greatest threat is Jane Austen. In Jane Austen political theory, more contested political environment, should give peasants important choices and peasants should have the right of choice, for better or worse. Without choices, things are usually worse off. For an autocracy, choices for peasants is bad, hence the best statecraft is Asiatic Legalist system.

One of the best tricks for Legalist statecraft includes fixing the opposition using ruinous lawsuits and subtle state coercion.

Ruler Loong said: "Teochew Kiang fucking good at throwing marbles at you, sometimes I also ambushed by his cheap marbles.

"But Familee got political power, I say, peasants do, that was my Ah Pa's LKY attitude.

"No matter what eloquent Jane Austen proses they use to bombard me, you think I care meh? At the end of the day, they only oppose within the parameters I gave them, anyone cross the line, I sure zap him or her ok."

Ruler Loong said the PAP's Peasants' Representatives, especially the new ones, have done well by working hard to improve Familee's political power and pretending to be establishing themselves with voters.

He said: "You know I know, all that 'Meet the Peasants' Session' is pure wayang, like retail politics and at the end of the day, its me and not the peasants who decide who becomes the Representatives, so those who think their Middle-Eastern deity, give them the grace, better re-examine your heads after today."

New office holders, too, have recognized Ruler Loong as the First Among Equals, said Ruler Loong. New-cumers like Overtime Tan and Kee Chiew have recognized it is their master, Ruler Loong who gives and takes their political office at moments' notice, not their deities.

In the next general procedural erections, Old Autocrat should have visited Lord Yama, but the results will be rigged to dent some opposition wards but Familee will still retain immense political power.


Click here to view the whole thread at www.sammyboy.com.