Condom

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An honorable member of the Coffee Shop Has Just Posted the Following:

It has been a "barbarous" weekend this far :)

Its ten to 8 now and I am just back from my usual Sunday morning run. While my thoughts are still "virginal", “cleanse” by the run, I reckon it's a good time to pen this piece, while the swine is still in his long siesta of snores (which incidentally is audible, despite the fact that I am in the lounge now).

I woke up at half past 6 this morning, freshened up, changed, slipped out of his apartment and begin my usual "pilgrimage". I have always enjoyed a good gallop every weekend. It keeps me in a pristine and slender shape. More importantly, it amalgamates the array of my conflicting brain cells ~ synthesizing heaven and hell ~ bringing me down to planet earth, where I belong.

Why did I use the word "barbarous"? Well, I have forgiven him :( . My iku-iku couldn't resist his efficacious "ku-chi-ku-chi" kungfu moves.

But, I utterly did not expect his newly minted ku-chi-ku-chi kungfu moves, the last two nights. They had rendered me wholly helpless. It was akin to those Hong Kong martial art dramas, where the victim’s 全身穴道 became totally immobilised. There was nothing I could do, but succumbed to his oral and physical fantasies, though “pugnacious”, was unequivocally desirous for me.

During the run, I pondered∼ why is he such a "highly skilled" sage, in his delivery of pleasure?

His new ku-chi ku-chi moves had titillated and gratified my luscious body, remitting ecstatic signals of love to my heart and brain, and further synthesise the two organs and ourselves into one. In fact, it added a new dimension to the song, which I often listened to, during my teenage years ∼ Spice Girls ∼ "2 Become 1". Then, it was a teenage fantasy. Now, it has really become an authentic reality.

For those who has read till here, I say, thank you. I must also say sorry. I can't pen any further on those "barbarous" acts, which I was subjected to. Further, I am neither a salacious writer, nor do I aspire to be one. Suffice to say, it was “sinfully” pleasurable, to the extent that I fear the veracity behind Proverbs 21:17 ~ "Whoever loves pleasure will be a poor (wo)man; (s)he who loves wine and oil will not be rich".

I am not a Christian. Even if I were, I am sure the God would approve my sensual enjoyment. God is the one that "designed" my body and the associated sensorial features. I am sure pleasure, must be something that God wanted me, and all human beings, to have. If not, why make us carnal? He could have easily written a macro, batch file or a script into our brains, rendering us incapable of any sensual desires.

Well, I have digressed, as the title of this thread is, "Condom". Let's get back to this thread title before this piece becomes a mucky exposition, of which I abhor and never intended to write as such.

Condom.

First, I am not referring to that roll-able polyurethane that protects me from his potent “ammunition” of highly militant “ISIS” tadpoles.

What I meant is a "Brain Condom”, which I want to purchase (if it has been invented), to stop his sensually active and simmering" brain, which is capable of sweet talking and also physically soothe any woman into ecstatic fluid-like exudation. This Brain Condom must stop him imagining sensually, numbing any visualisation(s) he may have, whatsoever, when he gazes at any woman in real life or on the internet.

Preferably, it should be in a form of a drug, which I am more than happy to pay good money for. If it hasn’t been invented, I implore that the big pharmaceutical companies, like GSK, to invent one. I shall be the first to volunteer that swine, for consumer product laboratory testing.

Before I go off to make our usual Sunday pancakes cum strawberry breakfast, I am wondering ∼ where did he acquire his new ku-chi-ku-chi skills?

Inborn? Or simply, a consequential experience from his association to the many Cocotte, Saseko or Amkae (which he has to date, not fully declared them to me) :(.

Hopefully, (if and when) I get my hands on this Brain Condom drug, I shall surreptitiously add to my signature Sweet and Sour Pork dish and feed him. This should effectively “anaesthetise” his sensual brain cells like a macro, batch file or a script, that God should have inputted into his brains in the first place (errr… not my brains, though :) ).

Hopefully, after his consumption of this “Brain Condom” drug ~ when he sees another Cocotte, Saseko or Amkae, ~ it will render him, sensually and sexually impotent. He will, of course, be faithful to me ~ the one and only Claire, in his life.

Then again, there must also be a 解药for me to administer on him, when I desire for his ku-chi ku-chi skills :) .

Enjoy your Sunday. Have a marvellous hot and sunny Sunday with your loved ones :)


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